Moved -

Moving Day

2011-04-04T16:27:00.000-04:00

Well, this is it - moving day. I'm shutting down this blog and I've transferred just about everything else to the new one. If you follow this blog, please start following at my new address - http://mandilivingston.blogspot.com. If you link to this blog, please change your link to the new one.

As someone who wishes to "be a writer" one day when I finally grow up, these little things are necessary for my creativity. I had a hard time writing an important email to a friend the other day just because I couldn't come up with the proper subject line. Instead, I sent a facebook message, avoiding that dreaded subject line. And with this blog, the url (that's web address for the non-geeky) always bugged me. As I stated a few weeks ago, it had to do with some silly interest I used to have, but knowing that 97% of you out there wouldn't get often could keep me from writing or sending out blog posts. Weird, I know, but my mind is wired that way and little things can keep me from being creative.

So, there you have it. Blog Moving Day 1.0.

Keep visiting me... I promise to write more! http://mandilivingston.blogspot.com

For Readers Edification: Published from My Little Corner of the Internet: http://fox-face.blogspot.com/. Unless otherwise notated, all written content is the intellectual property of Mandi Livingston.

Positive Breastfeeding News

2011-02-15T11:00:00.003-05:00

I am into month 11 of nursing my littlest one. And I don't see her stopping anytime soon.

Here are a few links to some positive things that I hope will encourage other mommies to breastfeed their babies or even extend nursing!

I don't agree with much that the Obama administration does, but for this news, I send them a little digital applause and cheers!

Michelle Obama to Promote Breastfeeding as a Means to Reduce Childhood Obesity

IRS Finally Recognizes Breastfeeding as a Health Benefit and Will Allow for Deductions of Breastfeeding supplies/pumps, etc.


Baby Blues - Jan 21, 2011

For Readers Edification: Published from My Little Corner of the Internet: http://fox-face.blogspot.com/. Unless otherwise notated, all written content is the intellectual property of Mandi Livingston.

Name Change

2011-01-28T23:20:00.003-05:00

Changing the name of the blog - and the focus. ~~Learning as They Grow~~ (a name of a popular parenting blog - so scratch that) Learning and Growing Together... being a mom is an experience where I learn every day. As my children grow, I learn. About myself than I ever imagine. About my beliefs. About what I thought I knew, but I don't. About being a friend. About being a wife. About love. About being a Child of God.

So, if you see Learning and Growing Together in your blogroll instead of Not One of the Guys, it's still me... Mandi.

~~Now, to eventually change the url and I'll be happy.~~ Nevermind... guess I won't update the url. I'm stuck with fox-face.blogspot.com. Which, to 97% of the population makes absolutely no sense. But, in case you were wondering what it is all about, it comes from an animated web series called Homestar Runner. Eric and I used to really dig it (in the days before kids). Here's the explanation. Now I'm kinda stuck with unless I migrate this blog somewhere else... and that's just too much work right now.

38 Years Ago Led to a House of Horrors

2011-01-22T16:05:00.005-05:00

I am a woman. I am a mother. I have been pregnant five times. Three precious children that I love more than life itself are here with me every day. Two sweet angels are waiting for me in God's arms, and I know that reunion one day will fill those two little holes in my heart.

I've stated before here time and again my unabashedly pro-life beliefs. Since my first pregnancy, I learned more about what a woman goes through during pregnancy, as well as how a baby develops to know that a person is a person, no matter how small (thanks, Dr. Suess for a great line).

Sadly, 38 years ago today, 7 men in black robes decided the fate of countless numbers of babies with a death sentence.

And today, a "minor" news story is unfolding. Why it isn't first page news, subject to intense scrutiny by the talk heads of the alphabet networks, is beyond me. Oh, wait, that's right, we need to focus on why a low-rated cable news man was fired, or the ad nauseum coverage of why Sarah Palin secretly influenced a lefty, mentally unstable boy to shoot up a shopping center crowd, or why a lady can't text and walk at the same time. I just checked - as of 4:33 EST 1/22/11, the only television news website that had any mention of this story was Foxnews. The rest - nope. CNN, ABC, CBS, NBC, MSNBC - no mention on the front page.

This news story is about the Philadelphia "Doctor" (I used that term loosely) that has murdered one woman, performed several late term abortions, and committed countless other travesties. Kermit Gosnell ran a house of horrors. All those things that Pro-Abortion forces say would happen if abortion were illegal - dead women, botched abortions, back-alley type conditions - all happening under the watchful eye of government officials at this licensed abortion facility.

There is one political entity that clearly bears some blame for what happened at Gosnell's Philadelphia clinic. The prosecutor found that key employees in the State Department of Health could have shut its doors, but they stopped their inspections, allegedly to suit what they believed to be the preference of their pro-choice governors.

Read more: http://politics.blogs.foxnews.com/2011/01/21/gruesome-allegations-surrounding-philly-abortion-doc-spur-washington-debate-0#ixzz1BnpDFBv1

Elizabeth Scalia is a blogger and editor of a pretty large Catholic website. She has profiled this case with Gosnell's clinic. I don't know how she was able to get through the entire case and write about it. But she did. After reading the entire grand jury report, she sums up in her article what happened at this house of horrors - a legal abortion clinic. And really, if you think this is just a one-off case... I've got some great beach front property in North Dakota to sell you.

I started to read some more detailed reports on this case that I found, but I can't. I can't finish. I get sick to my stomach and I shed tears over what happened at this place. What happened to living, breathing human beings is monstrous.

From Scalia's blog:

Many of the women who came to Gosnell were poor, and far along in their pregnancies They paid exorbitant sums to Gosnell (after being referred to him by who? Other doctors?) in order to be stripped from the waist down and given not-so-much as a gown — only blood-stained blankets that were washed once a week. They were anesthetized by unlicensed persons while flea-infested cats roamed freely. That’s just the tip of this iceberg, but I can’t go on because its too upsetting. The babies who “precipitated” and “fell out” of women while no medical personnel were available; babies being pulled out of the pipes or “seeming to swim” in the toilet. Babies breathing and crying before their spinal cords were “snipped” and their bodies were thrown into empty milk-cartins, cat food containers, shoe boxes. Women who were maimed or left infertile, or diseased or killed. The unwashed instruments, the bloody tables and stirrups, the feet severed from babies and kept as trophies.

Wow... totally unbelievable. And of course, today, our esteemed President of the United States released a statement commemorating the 38th Anniversary of the landmark decision Roe v Wade by saying,

Today marks the 38th anniversary of Roe v. Wade, the Supreme Court decision that protects women's health and reproductive freedom, and affirms a fundamental principle: that government should not intrude on private family matters.

Yep... Dr. Gosnell definitely protected women's health in the spirit of Roe v Wade, Mr. President. Than again... our President is the same man who while an elected official in the state of Illinois was more than willing to turn his head about babies left alive after botched abortions.

Tomorrow my sweet baby A turns 11 months old. But today, today is a bittersweet day as I think about Roe v Wade and the repercussions it has had on our society and the lives of so many. Sadly, Roe V Wade has resulted in a culture of death. And the seven men who decided that decision were our first "death panel."

Thomas the Tank Engine Christians

2011-01-07T23:09:00.003-05:00

Every night, I read a little devotional before bed. Several weeks ago, one of the lines in the scripture selection kinda resonated with me. I wanted to write something since I read it, but I still can't get everything to gel in my head. Still, this is one of those thoughts that haven't left, so I'm going to consider this a starting draft.

Here is the scripture:

2 Timothy2:20-21
20 In a large house there are articles not only of gold and silver, but also of wood and clay; some are for special purposes and some for common use. 21 Those who cleanse themselves from the latter will be instruments for special purposes, made holy, useful to the Master and prepared to do any good work.

The phrase that struck me probably won't make sense to some of you - especially if you don't have young kids who are currently or have been obsessed with Thomas the Tank Engine. I have two kids that have been nuts for Thomas. This past summer we went on a ride in Bryson City, NC, on Thomas. The picture is from our visit. After this event, we literally played Thomas and Friends every day for 6 weeks - either cartoons, video games, or building elaborate tracks for the toy trains.

If you can't sing the Thomas theme song or name his friends and engine numbers, allow me to explain. Thomas is a train that is from the Island of Sodor. He and his friends perform various tasks and such - delivering the mail, transporting tourists around the Island, delivering supplies, etc. They all work for Sir Topham Hatt, a portly little man who is head of the railway on Sodor. It is very important to all the Engines, but especially Thomas, that they be "really useful engines." However, in their daily work and subsequent adventures, many of the Engines prove to be less than useful, despite their best intentions. They let jealousies, competitions, rivalries, absent mindedness, etc. interfere with their best efforts. The stories are structured, however, that a lesson is learned by the end and the problems are solved.

As I've watched the shows with my children, the phrase "really useful engine" has always struck me as interesting. So, one night, when I'm reading my devotional, the verses from 2 Timothy really struck me - we are to be useful to our Heavenly Father. We often talk about serving the Lord, but how often do we think about being a "really useful" Christian and what it means?

Thomas the Train has his greatest desire to be "really useful." He strives constantly to be "really useful." You could take that scripture passage above and apply it to the railway on Sodor. Each train - some diesels, some steam engines - are different. However, they all work for their Master, ready to be useful and prepared to do great works. They have their issues, yes, and work through them, but their desire to be "really useful" remains.

I want to be a "really useful" Christian. Prepared to do any good work... And as my kids watch Thomas, I think it's really cool that I can take such a simple concept as Thomas & Friends and introduce a Biblical principle as well.

So, how about you? Do you want to be a Thomas the Tank Engine Christian, too?

Happy 2011!

2011-01-01T00:34:00.002-05:00

Happy New Year!

World Breastfeeding Week

2010-08-03T22:01:00.004-04:00

This is World Breastfeeding Week, so I'm going to share some of my favorite breastfeeding related info here. If you don't like boobies or are sensitive to hearing things about breasts, then move on, nothing for you to see here. Otherwise, Yeah for Mommies Milk!

First of all, an awesome article on the wonders of breast milk and how it helps develop protections in an immature baby gut. Breast Milk Sugars Give Infants a Protective Coat from the NY Times.

Dr. Jennifer Thomas has a great commentary she wrote on breast milk, childbirth, snuggling, and what behavior is normal for a brand new human baby. Love it. The Normal Newborn

And a video... and yes, not for the prudish. Nothing pictured there offensive, but I know some people that might be "SHOCKED" or have a Church Lady moment.

Faith & Trust

2010-07-20T16:37:00.003-04:00

Today at Chick-fil-a in North Charleston (yeah, we cheated and went to a different Chick-fil-a), Katie was playing in the kids area. For some reason, she felt like she wasn't big enough to climb up and down herself. She'd get half-way up and suddenly get terrified. She felt stuck. My friend Stephanie climbed up once to get her down, and then before we left, I had to climb into the contraption and get her down.

Katie could hang off one of the steps and her feet were just an inch or so above the step below. Her little brother could easily go up and down and he's smaller than she is. Katie saw other kids her size or smaller easily going up and down, up and down, yet - she was afraid. When I climbed in to get her, I tried to explain to her that she could just drop into my arms and nothing would happen. Instead, she wanted me to physically hold her and set her down. I'm not sure what was up with her. I've seen her climb into bigger play areas. I've seen her do much more physically than she seemed able to do today. I was confused by her reaction today.

And honestly... it irritated the heck out of me. I was a little irritated that she seemed unable to do something so simple as climb the apparatus. But what really, really irritated me and got under my skin was that she didn't trust me to catch her and get her down. She didn't trust when I said, "Just swing your legs down and I'll guide you down." There was a large part of her that had to be in control. She had to see what was below. I could see the conflict on her face. She knows Mommy wouldn't do anything that would put her in harms way, yet, she absolutely had to have things her way so that she felt safest. Basically, she has faith in me to protect her. I know that. She demonstrates that all the time. But at that moment, when she was in a predicament of uncertainty, she didn't have enough faith to trust me. She had to hang on with a sense of control. And that is what irritated me... her lack of faith and trust. I was hurt, angry, irritated, whatnot. My own daughter - someone I would die to protect - didn't 100% trust in my ability to help her in a time of need.

So, on the way home... it hit me. A ton of bricks (figuratively of course) fell onto me as I was driving the van home. Okay, yeah, I know. That was God talking, but it felt like a ton of bricks.

How many times do I in a time of need not 100% trust my Father in Heaven. Christ died for me - to save me from eternal damnation - and yet, there are plenty of times when I call on God and ask for His help, but... Yes, I add the "but" - it's something all of us too very human Children of God do... we say we trust him, but then we don't demonstrate it. We don't like the way God tries to help us, so we try to stay in control. We try to tell God, "Okay, so you helped me out of this predicament, but I didn't want you to help me that way, Lord." So many times God will say, "You are just inches from the bottom - just drop down and I'll catch you." And instead of obeying and realizing that He will catch us, we balk and try to tell God how to do His job.

Deuteronomy 33:27 says, "The eternal God is your refuge, and underneath are the everlasting arms." Today, God used a somewhat frustrating moment for me at a fast food restaurant to help me learn that I am not too different than my own daughter. I need to trust Him just as I wished my daughter had trusted me.

Great Time to be a Gamecock

2010-07-03T21:55:00.001-04:00

University of South Carolina - 2010 College World Series Champions! GO COCKS!

Ten Wonderful Years

2010-06-30T14:43:00.004-04:00

Romantic Snow Globes by WiddlyTinks.com

Happy Anniversary, babe! I love you even more today than I did on July 1, 2000. These past ten years have been absolutely wonderful and being your wife and the mother of your children is a blessing from God. I can't wait to see what the next ten years bring us!

The Mysterious Mr. Greene

2010-06-15T23:26:00.003-04:00

South Carolina has again proven itself to be a stellar state, upholding the highest of standards, rising above the fray... Uh, not so quickly. If the Luv Guv's "hiking the Appalachian trail" first catapulted my home state into the Hall of Shame for politics, we then had a follow-up with the brouhaha surrounding the Nikki Haley allegations from Will Folks and some other sorry political hack in SC. Then of course, not to be outdone, Sen Knott's infamous "Raghead" comment on Pub Politics helped to keep the Palmetto State front and center.

Now, at least the Democrats of my fine state have their own little fracas. Enter stage right - Alvin Greene. Poor sap decides to run for Senate. Somehow gets the filing fee. Somehow does nothing much to campaign. And somehow wins. Yep, beats almost as little known Vic Rawl (Really, outside of the Lowcountry, do you think you could find 15 democrats in the upstate or midlands who know of Vic Rawl? Did he even campaign?). Regardless, Alvin Greene wins... and wins big! Crush the mighty (cough, cough) Vic Rawl. And now the Dems are crying foul and trying to figure out what happened. Poor Mr. Greene is now covered in South Carolina political mud, and well, it's just a mess.

This video from Jon Stewart's The Daily Show explains it all... much better than anywhere else I've seen. And you get to laugh... a lot. I'm so writing in Grit Gravybiscuit next election.

The Daily Show With Jon Stewart

Mon - Thurs 11p / 10c

Alvin Greene Wins South Carolina Primary

www.thedailyshow.com

Daily Show Full Episodes

Political Humor

Tea Party

I will blog again

2010-06-15T15:52:00.003-04:00

I would like to blog more, I really would. Just haven't been inspired to lately, or the topic could be considered controversial, or I just haven't had the time.

But I want to write more. We'll see. Maybe I'll finally split my blog between personal and other topics.

Meanwhile, back to the grind. For some reason these three kids of mine actually need me to parent them! :)

Finding Rest

2010-04-22T09:52:00.001-04:00

Devotional I wrote for the April 2010 MOPS Crossroads newsletter.

I’m tired. Some days I’m really tired. Some days I don’t know how I’ll keep my eyes open. Such is life with a newborn, especially the third baby. I’m so busy running after my older two, that I don’t really have the chance to nap often. And a nursing newborn doesn’t allow for a night of uninterrupted sleep.

The last week of my pregnancy, I was basically put on bedrest. At the time I was just wishing they would do the c-section early, but my doctor was all about the magic of 39 weeks, so he wanted me to pretty much “be a slug” (his words) so I could make it to my scheduled section date at 39 weeks. I obeyed and did nothing. As a mom, I found it incredibly difficult. At times I was bored out of my mind, and other times, I just found myself wanting to have a normal routing. Making my kids lunch was a habit, and so I would find myself in the kitchen looking for the peanut butter… but my husband or family would shoo me out back to the recliner to rest.

During this time, I heard the small voice of the Holy Spirit reminding me that it is okay to rest. The Steven Curtis Chapman song based on Psalm 46:10 kept repeating in my head. “Be still and know that I am God… Be still oh restless soul of mine.” I was indeed restless that last week. I’m not sure how people do bed rest for extended periods. But I know I had to remember to “Be Still” and rest in Him. I think this was God’s way of making me slow down a bit that last week and try to rest as much as possible. God knows my limitations—and I do need a certain amount of rest to stay healthy and pleasant. And He knew that I was about to welcome Anna, our third child, and that I would be faced with a baby that doesn’t always allow me to get much rest.

So we get home with Anna and I knew that rest would be interrupted and sometimes hard to come by. But I think Jonah, my middle child, spoiled me somewhat as a baby because he slept so well. He was a nursing champ who took little time to eat and was always back asleep as quickly as possible. So, those nighttime feedings with him were not as tiresome as they had been with my firstborn, Katie. I had hoped and prayed that Anna would be like Jonah. But, she has reflux and for the first couple weeks would cry and fuss, even scream at times, for several hours in the middle of the night. After 5 or 6 days of this, I was exhausted. To the point of tears.

I found myself one night pacing the floor with my sweet, but fussing baby. I had been awake for 2.5 hours and just wanted to sleep. I needed to rest. I didn’t know how I was going to make it the next day. I started praying, begging God to please let Anna sleep. And again, I heard a still, small voice. I was reminded of some scripture that I clung to when Katie was a baby and wasn’t the world’s best sleeper, either. (At least Anna napped during the day!) Matthew 11:28 says, “Come to Me, all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest.” God was telling me that He alone was to be my source of relief from being weary. And then it struck me… Something I’m not proud to admit. I hadn’t been reading my Bible and praying like I knew I should. In the busyness of my life, I had kinda let that slip for the last few months. And then I remembered Isaiah 40:29-31. “He gives strength to the weary… those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength…. They will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.”

So I knew what I needed to do. I needed to find myself back in God’s word, fellowshipping with Him in prayer. Would it cure my tired feeling? Would it make Anna sleep 8 hours straight at night? No. I wasn’t delusional. But I did know that I could not continue on in my own strength.

After Anna finally went back to sleep that night, I opened my Bible and read a small devotional. And I keep that up every night. I find myself praying more. And, Anna, now that she’s on her reflux meds and Gripe water, is actually sleeping better. Not perfect—some nights are still rough. But God has allowed me to get more rest. Sometimes it is actual sleep, and other times, I really feel it is just His supernatural power giving me strength throughout the day. He knows what I need, and I just have to rely on him, as life on planet mom has taught me time and again.

Only Human

2010-01-15T18:55:00.003-05:00

I wrote this devotional for the January Crossroad MOPS newsletter.

You ever have one of those “I’m the worst mother in the world” moments, maybe even days? Lately, I’ve really struggled with that. I know in my head that I am NOT the worst mother in the world. I know that I am only human. I know that I can’t be all things to all people. I know that I am not perfect. I know that I can’t prevent my children from experiencing pain and suffering. My head tells me all of that. But that doesn’t mean in my spirit, in my heart I always know it. And when life throws all sorts of grenades at you, and you try to duck them but they explode anyway, it’s sometimes hard to not feel down on yourself… especially for mothers I think.

We have that precious little baby and only want good things for her. That new life is so tiny, so helpless we even try to pretend that we can prevent bad things from happening, thinking we can protect that little life like no other.

But then reality hits us one day in the face and we feel as if we failed. It might be as simple as your child scraping their knee or getting made fun of by another child. Or, it might be something more serious: severe injury, life threatening illness, or worse.

And then, we second guess ourselves. We go through everything that led up to that event and think of what could we have done differently. What in our power could we have done to protect them better?

I recently walked this path myself. My son Jonah fell, hitting the left side of his head and fracturing his skull. All I could think about is how could I have stopped this. I started to play the incident over and over in my head and second guessed everything leading up to the fall. The guilt I felt that I wasn’t right next to him to catch him when he fell was tremendous. Even now, weeks later, I find myself fighting it occasionally.

But I had some friends give me great counsel about this. Several told me that was nothing but Satan trying to make me believe I wasn’t a good enough mother. And just this week, as I tried to get the newsletter done and write this devotional, Jonah fell again playing with Katie and I just about lost it thinking he may have exacerbated his injury. And then I felt awful for losing my temper with Katie over the incident. Again, I felt like a terrible mommy. I know that I’m not. I apologized to her and she gave me the sweetest hug which reassured me that I must be doing something right.

But Satan, the Father of Lies and the Great Deceiver, was attacking me and making me question my abilities as a mother. And you may have found yourself in the same position before—questioning if you were a good mother, feeling as if nothing you did was right. But we can’t fall for that line of thinking. If we do, we lose ground. We won’t be as effective an influence on our children for Christ. We will be discouraged and our children will pick up on that as they get older. God equipped us to be the mother our children need us to be. It’s just a matter of staying in His will, trusting in His word, and bathing ourselves and our children in prayer regularly.

As I was dealing with the immediate aftermath of hearing my 19 mo old son had a skull fracture, I was telling another MOPS mom how I felt terrible and how I should have prevented it from happening, and how I felt at fault because I couldn’t stop it. And she said something that was quite profound, at least to me, anyway. She said, “God isn’t to blame when bad things happen to us.” We are his children, and sometimes in our lives, we experience pain and suffering. But that doesn’t make it God’s fault. As we grow in Him, trials and such come our way, but in the end, they strengthen us and mold us into the person God intended us to be. It’s a hard lesson to learn, but true.

When bad things happen to our children, our job is to simply be their mother—to comfort them, hold them, and as they get older, hopefully help them learn how to avoid troubles in the future. That is what God does for us. In Isaiah 66:13 we are told that “as a mother comforts her child, so will I comfort you.” God doesn’t promise we won’t experience trials and pain, but he promises to comfort us during those times.

So for Jonah, I couldn’t prevent him from falling when he did. I couldn’t prevent the injury. But I certainly have hugged and loved and comforted him, and even tried to protect him as he heals (hard task to keep a toddler boy from falling or bumping his noggin). I’ve done what God has equipped me to do. And I’m learning every day that I’m not a terrible mom—just a human one. And my kids still love me anyway.

Great New Video

2010-01-04T11:59:00.001-05:00

Thought I'd share this here on my blog. Granted, *I* didn't vote for the "hope" and "change," but as a whole, America did - and now, America is Rising.

America Rising: An Open Letter to Democrat Politicians
Uploaded by Buckrush. - News videos from around the world.

New Year 2010

2010-01-01T15:45:00.000-05:00

Happy New Year!!!

Mary the Mother and Jesus the Child

2009-12-18T15:16:00.004-05:00

Newborn babies cry. It's a fact. Newborns cry for a variety of reasons.

I need food
I need comfort
I need rest
I need a diaper change
I need to burp
I have gas
I am too warm or too cold

Those are just some of the more common reasons. Crying is the way a newborn communicates to those who can take care of his needs.

So, I get really bothered by people who act like crying means the baby is bad. Sure, babies can have a temper and can learn to manipulate parents and such with crying, but for the most part, crying is NOT a sinful thing in the life of a newborn - especially a newborn that is just hours old or days old. Crying is especially helpful to first time parents because first time parents don't really know a whole lot about babies, and crying clues first timers into the fact that action of some sort needs to be taken.

Since becoming a parent, I have to say that the Christmas Carol Away in the Manger really bothers me. I sing nightly to my babies as I put them to bed. At Christmas time, I like to throw in a few carols and soothing Christmas songs. When I get to the part that says "The cattle are lowing, the baby awakes/But little Lord Jesus no crying he makes," I just kinda get annoyed.

And I've heard preachers and teachers in the past pretty much pass on this same message. They want to paint Jesus as some "super baby" because of His divinity. Surely Jesus wouldn't cry!

I have to wholeheartedly disagree. Jesus was 100% God, but he was also 100% human. He came to Earth as an innocent, helpless baby. He experienced humanity in all ways, save having a sin nature. So, it would only make sense that as a baby he would cry. That is how a baby communicates with those around him. Jesus felt pain and discomfort. Jesus felt joy and adulation. Jesus felt... Jesus wept. So, yes, as a baby he would cry! There is nothing sinful about a newborn crying. I've always felt those lyrics from Away in the Manger try to show us just how divine and wonderful this little baby in the manger was. But I think the fact that he did cry, and probably would have cried when awoken suddenly by cattle, shows even more the wondrous nature of Jesus - that the Son of God would give up all power and glory to be as helpless as a newborn, and one that was sleeping in a dirty manger.

Likewise, I just can't imagine what Mary went through as the mother of the Messiah. She knew when the angel revealed to her she was pregnant what that little life inside of her would go through. Surely, she had heard and read the prophecies - Isaiah says, "He was oppressed, and he was afflicted, yet he opened not his mouth: he is brought as a lamb to the slaughter, and as a sheep before her shearers is dumb, so he openeth not his mouth."

As a mother, I can attest that you want the best for your children. You don't want them to suffer in any way. You don't want to see them in pain. When they do experience pain, you do what you can to comfort them and hope and pray it doesn't happen again. You fight for your child. You get angry when they are treated badly and they have their feelings hurt. It is a mother's instinct to protect her young.

Imagine Mary holding that small baby just after birth... looking into his sweet face and yet knowing, at some point in his life, she would no longer be able to protect him. What mixed emotions. She was the boo-boo fixer, the one who kissed little wounds he probably received while tinkering in Joseph carpentry shop as child. When he was a child and ran and might have tripped, she helped him up. Jesus was fully human. And Mary was there for her fully human son.

I can't imagine what she must have experienced as the mother of the Messiah. My heart as a mother is broken enough at times as I intercede for my children in prayer, or as I watch my son get a stitch in his lip after an injury, or as I comfort my little girl because a child at a playdate might have said something mean to her. Just imagine watching your child grow up and become reviled by so many that they would sentence him to death by crucifixion. Imagine seeing your child in that pain - the helpless feeling you would have.

The first time I saw Mel Gibson's The Passion of the Christ I was still a couple years away from motherhood. But one scene stood out to me then - Mary and Jesus interacting on the Via Dolorosa as he carried his cross. Certainly, we don't know what happened on his way to Golgotha, but this scene was so powerful to me in 2004. And now, as a mother, I can't watch it without sobbing - not just tearing up - but sobbing. I've embeded it here for you to watch as well. It's not your typical Christmas thought or image, but as a mother, I think about it every Christmas.

(if you are reading this via Facebook notes that import my blog - you can view it here:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pZeN6kdgM2Y)

Filthy Rags

2009-12-16T22:50:00.003-05:00

I wrote this for the Oct 09 Crossroads MOPS Newsletter... just got around to posting it here. Enjoy!

Life on Planet Mom is full of many chores and tasks. Some are tedious, some are tiring, and some are just irritating.

One task that I particularly dislike is laundry. It is a necessity, but I still just don’t like it. I think the process of washing clothes just has too many steps. Sorting, washing, drying, folding, hanging up, ironing. Oh, and treating stains. That falls in the process somewhere along the way. I really never understood how much went into stain treatment until I landed on Planet Mom. And then I had a breastfeeding newborn.

Who knew that breastfeeding poo could squirt out of even the most well closed diaper? That’s something that they don’t tell first time moms. If they do, I missed that memo. And of course, it requires a little stain treating action.

And then… that little newborn starts to grow up, and the wonder of feeding solid foods begins. Sweet potatoes, avocado, peas, carrots, and more dribble off little chins onto cute outfits or even just the standard onesie. And then self-feeding begins. And that involves a variety of foods that find their way onto all sorts of clothing, bibs, walls, and carpets.

Add on top of that the occasional round of diarrhea, vomit, finger paint, medicine, crayon, blood, dirt, mud, grass, and more that kids clothing is stained with… and well, as moms, we spend a good deal of our time scrubbing clothes, coming up with a variety of stain treatment mixes, and more just trying to get that piece of clothing presentable for another public wearing.

So, since I really hate doing laundry, the added chore of stain treating just about everything my daughter wears or touches (yes, my 3.5 year old is messier than my 1.5 year old) can sometimes make me wonder if it is worth the effort.

And then, like I’ve mentioned before, in the middle of the mundane tasks that we residents of Planet Mom experience, I hear the quiet voice of God talking to me. I’m muttering to myself, “stupid mac n’ cheese” as I scrub a pair of shorts. “These shorts are no better than a rag now.” So, I make a decision to just give up on the stained clothing and put it in the play clothes pile.

And then, revelation. God speaks. And truth is revealed in the middle of that laundry room. God reminds me that as a sinner, I am no different than that soiled pair of shorts I hold in my hands. Isaiah 64:6 says : All of us have become like one who is unclean, and all our righteous acts are like filthy rags. No matter what good deeds I may do in my life, no matter how “righteous” I try to be, those acts are no better than the dirty, stained laundry that surrounds me in the laundry room. There is nothing that I can do that cleanses myself before God.

However, our God provides a way for us to be transformed. Something better than bleach, Oxy-clean, Tide, or a Stain Stick! I John 1:7, 9, says "(7) the blood of Jesus His Son cleanses us from all sin" and "(9) If we confess our sins, He is faithful and righteous to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness."

So, I stand there, holding those stained shorts in my hand, marveling that God is God. I’m about to give up on those shorts, just like I have on so many other pieces of clothing. And I just thank the Lord that my God did NOT give up on me or you. Even though our sins make us no better than a filthy, soiled rag, our God saw value in us. Our God did not just throw us away or put us in a play clothes pile. Our God restores us!!! With the blood of Jesus Christ, the ULTIMATE stain fighter, he cleanses us!

I can’t help but think of the old hymn I learned as child. Whiter than Snow by James Nicholson. Enjoy!

Lord Jesus, I long to be perfectly whole; I want Thee forever to live in my soul; Break down every idol, cast out every foe— Now wash me, and I shall be whiter than snow.
Whiter than snow, yes, whiter than snow, Now wash me, and I shall be whiter than snow.
Lord Jesus, let nothing unholy remain, Apply Thine own blood and extract every stain; To get this blest cleansing, I all things forego— Now wash me, and I shall be whiter than snow.

Local Cap & Trade Efforts - City of Charleston

2009-12-14T11:47:00.003-05:00

Cap & Trade is not just a national issue - It's now "Local" as well. Here's a letter from the Charleston Tea Party group that went out on their email list. If you live in the City of Charleston you may want to pay attention to this...

From: Patriots of Charleston/Charleston Tea Party
Sent: Sunday, December 13, 2009 2:35 PM
To: XXXXXXXXXX
Subject: CHARLESTON GREEN COMMITTEE

Based on what I have recently heard this has become an urgent item. There was a meeting on 12/2,with folks from the Charleston Green Committee and I received a chilling report. The committee’s recommendation appears to be a Charleston Cap and Trade set of rules and regulations! The attitude is one of “the government knows best” and “who are you to say government should not be responsible for telling citizens what kind of car to drive?” Literally, today the statement was made that “if the people don’t choose to drive the right kind of cars then the government needs to mandate them”. The plan is focused on taxes, fees, rules, regulations all of which infringe on our freedoms and property rights. There was a proposal to ban wood fires and impose taxes/fees on cars/trucks based on size/horsepower.

We need several actions:

Get the word out to all of our groups and ask folks to go tohttp://www.charlestoncity.info/shared/docs/0/greenplanfinal_2009.10.28.pdf to review the recommendation and understand the issues. There are some legitimate points regarding our need to be good stewards of our resources and environment; however, that does not mean we give up property rights and freedoms all for “the greater good”. Yes, that was used in the meeting today.
For any groups that want more insight, I can arrange for someone to come present the issues and provide first hand knowledge of today’s meeting as well as other background.
We must have a large representation at the Charleston City Council Meeting on Tuesday, December 15th, to express our opposition to the committee’s recommendations. Charleston City Hall, 18 Broad Street, Charleston, SC 29401Tuesday (Dec 15) no later than 4:45 pm.
I suggest we contact Charleston City Council members that we know and urge them to oppose the Charleston Green Committee recommendation.
I also recommend that we contact those NEW council members for whom we worked in the recent election and ask them for their support. This will be a good way of showing our commitment to issues and letting them know what to expect when they take office in January. We believe part of the rush to push this recommendation through is because YOU were successful in replacing 3 out of 4 council members and the “cap and trade” crowd should have a more difficult time enacting these recommendations after January 1st.

We were successful in the recent election cycle and now is the time to build on that success and keep the momentum going. This is an excellent example of why local elections matter and we need to demonstrate that our conservative coalition is a positive force.

I have been following this because of my commercial real estate business. It is something that will affect all of us as property and/or homeowners, not just someone in “the real estate business”.

I have enclosed a few key points and the link to the newly released Charleston Green Committee recommendations. Some of the key elements are:

On Page 36: B4 – Encourage Disclosure of Utility Data and Building Performance and the subsequent strategies to implement that, which calls for sellers to disclose 12 months of utility bills.

On Page 77: The Storm water section which would call for Storm water impact fees and higher standards for buffers.

Throughout the document, it also calls for transportation impact fees and for them to be tiered based on how far outside the city the development is. The further away the higher the impact fee.

And it also called for the Energy Efficiency Loan Program to provide low-interest loans to upgrade existing properties to make them more efficient.

While there are some good ideas included and we do need to be good stewards of our resources, this is about taxes, regulations and continued nibbling away of property rights and associated freedom.

http://www.charlestoncity.info/shared/docs/0/greenplanfinal_2009.10.28.pdf

Be prepared, it’s 23MB and 181 pages so I suggest downloading and then viewing it if you’re interested.

This is a subject that we need to be discussing quickly and consistently with the City Council. I also believe this will be exported to all of our local municipalities in the name of “green”.

This is another example of why local elections matter. Please let me know if you have questions. Thank you for your help.

Milestones come and go...

2009-12-06T22:03:00.004-05:00

Sometimes I feel like this entire blog focuses on nothing more than my emotional ups and downs from two miscarriages. I really do want to write about more than just that, but it seems when things are going well, I don't really have much to say. I stay busy with my daily life, and only think about clever things I could share here, cute kids stories, political thoughts, arm-chair quarterbacking college football, etc. Instead, it seems that only when things get a little crazy, and I need a place to vent, to work things out, that I find time to write. That frustrates me greatly, but it just shows that I need to find regular time to write. Perhaps an early New Years resolution, eh?

But the last week of November and first week of December was a little tough - emotional ups and downs. And it all had to do with two Milestone that came and went: first, the "birthday" of the first baby I miscarried - would have been born November 16, 2007. And then, a new milestone, the due date for the baby I miscarried in May. - December 6. I didn't want to focus on it too much. But it actually hit me subconsciously. First, I had a weird dream that I was pregnant with two babies - one several months ahead of the one I'm currently carrying. I woke up and the dream was so real and stayed with me for much of the following day. I was in a funk, didn't know why, and then it hit me - the due date week had come. I didn't really know how to mention it to anyone, but I did quietly ask a few friends from MOPS to pray for me and uplift me. It was a MOPS week after all, too, and I didn't need those attacks on my spirit. God bless the ladies in MOPS - sometimes I wonder how moms without MOPS make it!

I could tell their prayers helped me tremendously - the funk lifted and I felt better. I just thought I had handled this second miscarriage so much better than the first, that the funk that hit me just really surprised me. But God is good, I felt His peace, and I think ended up being a nicer person at home. :)

That following Sunday at church, the sermon was perfect. And then, the music - the closing song - gave me what I think I needed most - an emotional release. Surprisingly, I hadn't heard it before, but it was Always by Building 429. The video is below. I cried a bit during the song, cried for the first time probably since May or June about my loss. Eric just rubbed my shoulder... I don't even know if he knows why I was crying. We don't always talk about the babies we lost. It's something that other than a few ladies at MOPS and the occasional blog post that I keep to myself in my heart. I share when I need to - to help others going through similar pain.

But for anyone who is going through tough times, pain, or just needs encouragement - God is Faithful. He truly is. This time of year we should all reflect on the ultimate faithfulness of God - the gift of His son. And that's the message of Building 429's song. Watch the video.

The big reveal....

2009-10-19T10:49:00.003-04:00

(note: random image found on the internet - not my belly)

October 15 - A Day of Remembrance

2009-10-14T21:25:00.003-04:00

Wow... I never imagined that this year, on Pregnancy & Infant Loss Remembrance Day, I would be remembering two sweet angel babies. My first miscarriage was in April of 2007. Wait - stop for a minute. Do you know how incredibly odd it feels every time I utter "first miscarriage" or "second miscarriage." When I began my adventure in motherhood the summer of 2005 getting pregnant with Katie, I never imagined I would be here 4 years later. One miscarriage, let alone TWO!

But yet... I find myself pregnant again - this week officially half way through another pregnancy. We are expecting our third. Wait - stop for a minute. Every time I say that - every time I talk about this baby in terms of numbers, I feel the loss - No, we are expecting baby number 5. Baby 2 & Baby 4 (yes, I have named them - but that is a personal thing that I don't share) are in Heaven. Baby 5 is in my womb - I feel this baby move and kick. And tomorrow, on October 15th - a day that is nationally recognized as Pregnancy & Infant Loss Remembrance Day - Eric and I will find out the sex of this baby. Wow. God works in mysterious ways.

But since my first pregnancy loss, well, to put it as one of my dear friends says, I am a totally different person. God has moved so much in my life and there isn't an overwhelming sadness anymore. Sure I can tear up listening to certain songs or when certain milestone days might pass by, but I truly feel God's peace. Walking the path of pregnancy loss for a second time wasn't as hard as I thought it would be.

I told several people "I don't think I could ever make it through a second miscarriage. I think it would devastate me." But God is amazing and awesome and worked so much in my life without me even realizing it. I am okay. In fact, I am stronger. This second loss this past May did not devastate me. As the reality hit me that Sunday morning in May when I started experiencing miscarriage symptoms, the first thing that came to my mind was a Praise song by Casting Crowns - I Will Praise You in this Storm. I recently saw a church sign that said, "Praise is a decision - not a reaction." And I can say that is entirely true.

I told God after my first miscarriage that I wanted to see something good come from my pain and loss. God is not finished with me yet. And I've been able to take my experience and comfort and counsel others who have walked the path of pregnancy loss.

So, October 15th - A Day of Remembrance. For 8 weeks and 11 weeks, I had the distinct privilege of having two little lives with me, even if the time was so short. And I can't imagine how sweet that reunion in Heaven will be.

***************************************

An excellent book for those experiencing the loss of a pregnancy or infant -
Grieving the Child I Never Knew: A Devotional Companion for Comfort in
the Loss of Your Unborn or Newly Born by Kathe Wunnenberg

***************************************

Brief Information about October 15th - Pregnancy & Infant Loss Remembrance Day
You can find out more at http://www.october15th.com

Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day is a day of remembrance for
all pregnancies and infant death which includes but not limited to
miscarriage, stillbirth, SIDS, or the death of a newborn. It is
recognized in the United States and throughout Canada on October 15th
of each year.

The Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Movement began in the United
States On October 25, 1988 when former American President Ronald
Reagan designated the month of October 1988 as ``Pregnancy and Infant
Loss Awareness Month. During that proclamation, President Reagan
stated, "When a child loses his parent, they are called an orphan.
When a spouse loses her or his partner, they are called a widow or
widower. When parents lose their child, there isn’t a word to describe
them.”

The October 15th Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day Campaign
began in 2002 as an American movement. As a result of the American
campaign effort Concurrent resolution H. CON. RES. 222 Supporting the
goals and ideals of National Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day
was passed in the House of Representatives on September 28, 2006.

********************
Psalm 139:13-16
13 For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb.
14 I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your
works are wonderful, I know that full well.
15 My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret
place. When I was woven together in the depths of the earth,
16 your eyes saw my unformed body. All the days ordained for me were
written in your book before one of them came to be.

So very busy!

2009-09-01T09:46:00.003-04:00

I didn't blog any in August. I wanted to several times, but things are so very busy at home, sick kids, with MOPS about to start, and several other things.

Oh well, I'll have to make up for it in September. You've been warned!

Unalienable Rights

2009-07-30T15:40:00.004-04:00

We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable rights, that among these are life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness. That to secure these rights, governments are instituted among men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed.

Okay, boys and girls, time to put on your thinking cap and explore this portion of the Declaration of Independence. Thomas Jefferson penned some of the most beautiful words in the history of government when he wrote this section of the Declaration of Independence. Actually, the whole document is beautifully written and deserves intense study, which is sadly lacking in most schools and universities these days. So, I'm going to take a few minutes to give a little civics lesson here in my teeny, tiny corner of the internet.

Notice TJ prefaced it all that what he was about to say was truth, and not only that, but it should be self-evident. In other words, it should be pretty obvious. By virtue of being human, we have some God-given rights - Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Happiness.

The word "unalienable" is the key in the sentence. During the age this document was written, philosophers and thinkers had categorized rights into two types - Natural and Legal. Here's a brief description of the two as taken from Wikipedia:

Natural rights (also called moral rights or inalienable rights) are rights which are not contingent upon the laws, customs, or beliefs of a particular society or polity. In contrast, legal rights (sometimes also called civil rights or statutory rights) are rights conveyed by a particular polity, codified into legal statutes by some form of legislature, and as such are contingent upon local laws, customs, or beliefs. Natural rights are thus necessarily universal, whereas legal rights are culturally and politically relative.

So, one of our founding documents, the Declaration of Independence, lays it out plainly for all to see that by the basis of being human, people have a right to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.

What I'd like to focus on here is the first one - Life. We have a right to live.

I could go into a very strong Anti-Abortion stance here, but I'm not going to. That's not the gist of this blog entry. If you read my blog, you know how strongly pro-life I am and how much I abhor abortion.

Our right to live could soon be replaced with a duty to die. It's like I'm living in Opposite World now. Our government, if this Healthcare boondoggle passes, will be promoting "end of life" counseling sessions for Seniors, including information on how to refuse treatment and sustenance in order to not prolong the dying process. If you think I'm crazy, just read pages 425-446 of the bill currently being pushed by the White House. There is an excellent Op-Ed in the Wall Street Journal about this issue, by the way, by someone who has read the ENTIRE bill (and LIVED to tell about it!).

Think I'm crazy that a duty to die initiative is not being foisted upon us should Government Healthcare pass into law? The White House has tapped Ezekiel J. Emanuel (Chief of Staff Rahm's brother) as a Health Care policy advisor. He is bio ethicist at the National Institutes of Health, a right to die advocate, and a proponent of state-assisted suicide.

Here are some of Emanuel's best writings, published just this year in the British medical journal Lancet (1/31/2009)

Published Jan. 31, 2009 in the British medical journal Lancet, Emanuel's euthansia-selection article appeared 11 days after President Obama's inauguration. Then on March 19, Emanuel was appointed to the Federal Coordinating Council on Comparative Effectiveness Research, to begin the design of a Federal system for withdrawing care from those chosen for death.

Emanuel sums up who is to be treated, and who is to die:

"When implemented, the complete lives system produces a priority curve on which individuals aged between roughly 15 and 40 years get the most substantial chance, whereas the youngest and oldest people get chances that are attenuated." This may be justified by public opinion, since "broad consensus favours adolescents over very young infants, and young adults over very elderly people."

Emanuel decrees that we must not kill only the elderly, but also infants.

"Strict youngest-first allocation directs scarce resources predominantly to infants. This approach seems incorrect. The death of a 20-year-old woman is intuitively worse than that of a 2-month-old girl, even though the baby has had less life. The 20-year-old has a much more developed personality than the infant, and has drawn upon the investment of others to begin as-yet-unfulfilled projects.... Adolescents have received substantial substantial education and parental care, investments that will be wasted without a complete life. Infants, by contrast, have not yet received these investments.... It is terrible when an infant dies, but worse, most people think, when a three-year-old child dies, and worse still when an adolescent does."

You can read more about it at this blog.

This is one of the key advisers to this administration on Healthcare. Emanuel is shaping policy in this country that could soon determine who lives and who dies because of some formula some beancounter in Washington has on a spreadsheet.

What will be the magic age for Life? At what age will we lose our UNALIENABLE RIGHT to Life? When does it just go away? 60? 66? 70? 75? 80? Younger? It's like living in some weird sci-fi world like Logan's Run, where you had to extinguish your life at 30.

This slippery slope is about to get much more slick. It all started, I believe, when we took our CREATOR (from TJ's words in the Declaration) out of things. If we don't acknowledge a Creator, then we slowly don't recognize those rights that are given to us by the Creator. The Creator was taken out of government, so to speak, in the 60's. The first assault on Life started in the 70's with Roe v Wade. And now, what the Pro-Life movement has been warning for years (and ridiculed about by the "progressives") is so close to being a reality. The Duty to Die.

Now that you can see there is an assault one of the basic rights we have as humans, when will the assault on Liberty and the Pursuit of Happiness pick up? Is it already happening?

Finally, one last thing - the final sentence I quoted in my snippet from the Declaration -

That to secure these rights, governments are instituted among men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed.

Our representatives in Washington have totally forgotten this part - they derive their powers from US.

The majority of Americans DO NOT WANT this healthcare bill to pass. But, sadly, I fear our representatives in Washington will forget "the consent of the governed" part. And instead, from their Ivory Towers, look down on us all and tell us what they think is best.

Thomas Jefferson must be rolling over in his grave, along with all the others who shed their blood in the hope of creating a free country that recognized basic, natural, unalienable rights. As I watch the news each night and read the internet daily, I just shake my head and wonder if I'm living in bizarro world. It certainly seems like it.

Life Matters.

Fresh Milk

2009-07-22T22:21:00.003-04:00

Kids are awesome, and I happen to think that mine are super awesome. K is just growing up so quickly and always makes us laugh with her unique take on everything.

Today, I was pouring her a bowl of Lucky Charms. She asked for milk. I was confused, did she mean the milk meant for the cereal? So, I asked her, "Milk in the cereal or fresh milk to drink?"

She says, "Fresh Milk" and runs and grabs out of the drawer my manual Avent Isis breast pump. I tell her that I don't make that kind of milk right now since Jonah doesn't nurse anymore. Katie then proceeds to lift up her shirt, put the breast pump to her chest, and says, "Maybe I have milk."

I had to keep from really laughing to hard. I didn't want her think think I was laughing at her. but it was so cute. I explained to her that one day, when she's a mommy, she'll have milk, but not right now.

Pretty cool she associates "fresh milk" with breast milk. That's my girl!

A Missing Holiday?

2009-07-08T17:34:00.004-04:00

Just a thought and a commentary on our times, perhaps. As a parent, I notice that every holiday, NickJr, Disney, Noggin, they all show holiday-appropriate episodes. Dora saves Santa, Dora celebrates Three Kings Day, Diego helps the animals celebrate Halloween, Max & Ruby have Thanksgiving dinner, Wow Wow Wubbzy helps the Easter Bunny, Tigger & Pooh deliver Valentines, even Ni Hao, Kai-Lan celebrates Chinese New Year. Curious George even has his own version of Ground Hound Day for crying out loud!

Sadly, I noticed this year, that I don't think any of the current cartoon giants celebrate Independence Day. You may say this is because they don't cater to just an American audience, or even some of them aren't American (Dora, Diego, Kai-Lan). But, it's okay to do an entire Kai-Lan on the Chinese New Year? But, that's CULTURAL! How dare I question that?

Honestly, I think this cuts to the core of what is wrong with the entertainment elites who drive our entertainment choices and determine what is culture and what is worthy of educating our young minds about. They don't see July 4th as an important holiday. Teaching patriotism to our youngsters is too right-wing for them. Why should we ask our children to grow up being proud of their country? Why should we even teach them about the importance of the Independence Day holiday? These entertainment elites probably would've sides with George III and thought it was wrong that a group of citizens wanted to throw off the chains of tyranny.

I think I want to stock up more and more on these type of cartoons - Looney Tunes celebrating American Values. And didn't Snoopy serve as a World War I fighter ace against the Germans? There was a "This is America, Charlie Brown" cartoon, but Charles Schultz was one-of-a-kind. Even Mickey Mouse at one time was pretty patriotic. And I think at one time Schoolhouse Rock had a series of American-themed shows.

If I'm wrong and you've seen an example of a current kids cartoon that has celebrated America, let me know. Otherwise, just a small rant on what appears to be a missing holiday on our current cartoon networks.

Governor to Resign

2009-07-03T16:38:00.004-04:00

No, we South Carolinians are not lucky enough to have our useless, cheating Governor resigning. Instead, Alaska Governor Sarah Palin is resigning as of July 26. She says she wants to "affect positive change" outside of Government and mentions politics has become a "superficial, wasteful bloodsport."

My initial thoughts on this subject. I wouldn't blame her if she was doing this solely because she's sick of the crap she's still getting so far removed from the election of 08. Honestly, how many times has the VP Candidate on a LOSING ticket been attacked so much after an election is over. The whole David Letterman fiasco would be enough to make me want to just say ENOUGH. Maybe she wants to spend more time with her kids and grandchild...

But, I don't think this is Sarah's tact here. I totally think she's making some smart moves here for the future. Yes, she may get attacked for not finishing her gubernatorial term. But... the attacks have been so constant since she was picked by McCain, even from the Dem Party in her own state, that she can say she's stepping aside for the good of the people of Alaska. Getting a major distraction out of the way so that the government of her state can continue operating instead of being tied up in hyper-partisan politics.

Also, she helps the Grand Ole Party right now by getting Ensign and Sanford out of the headlines. Two up and comers in the GOP, even those being touted for 2012, fall from grace, and Sanford's is a big, massive implosion still happening. So, now Sarah gets that off the front-pages.

Further, she is in prime position to now be free to travel and help raise much needed $$$ for GOP candidates for the 2010 mid-term election. She is EXTREMELY popular with the grassroots and is one of the best GOP fundraisers. I'm sure that she'll be hitting the speaking circuit soon with gusto. Oh, and she doesn't even need a teleprompter in order to give a decent speech!

If she is interested in running for POTUS in 2012, this also lets her have the freedom to travel the lower 48.

Finally, she is one of the few people in the GOP who actually don't mind standing up and speaking out against the current regime in Washington. With the pass of Cap & Trade in the House, she's set to be able to really work the public hoping that it dies a slow death in the Senate. As a Governor from an energy-producing state, she can show the American people that this bill is disastrous in so many ways (I hope to blog about that soon) and will be extremely costly to the average American if it passes into law. Palin is a pitbull with lipstick and she's getting ready to be unleashed.

I'm sure we'll see this discussed quite a bit on the morning talk show circuit and the 24 hour news channels. It will be interesting to see how it plays out.

3 Little Pigs

2009-06-30T23:08:00.003-04:00

Yeah, at first glance, you see just two piggies in this picture. But after the Governor's continuing revelations of women and continuously changing stories about his inability to remain faithful to his wife and family... all I got to say, is when I look at this picture, I see three pigs.

Resign, now, Mr. Sanford. You are a disgrace and I no longer can tolerate seeing your face on my television. I think you are purposefully dragging out this scandal and saying more and more hurtful things about your relationships in order to force your wife's hand to file for divorce. You don't have the cajones to walk away from your own marriage. But you obviously, desperately, want out, so that you can fly back to your "soul-mate." You are a terrible husband, an awful example as a father, and a miserable excuse for a human being. Please, just step aside so that our state no longer has to be subjected to your soap opera romances and what will be the most ineffective 18 months in political history.

Better than Nationwide, God is on My Side!

2009-06-24T12:42:00.004-04:00

Got this letter in the mail yesterday from Nationwide insurance as a solicitation.

All I could think when I saw the envelope is that just over 2000 years ago, God, too, sent out a letter to all of humanity that we have been "Pre-Forgiven" if we just accept the gift of Salvation.

When I opened the letter to read what it said, the first part of the letter read as such,

Life comes at your Fast. But when you come to Nationwide Insurance, you can be forgiven before anything even happens. (If only all of life were like that.)

Wow, see, Life IS like that! We're all sinners. The penalty for sinning is death (Romans 6:23). John 3:16 tells us of how God loved the world so much that He have His only son that whoever believes on Him will not perish, but have life everlasting! Colossians 1 tells us that as believers, were are rescued from the dominion of darkness, and are part of the kingdom of the Son, in whom we have redemption through the blood of Christ and forgiveness of sins!

So, 2000 years ago on the cross, my sins were forgiven before I was even born. Now, that is accident forgiveness I can live with!

Interesting Mall Visit

2009-06-10T16:35:00.002-04:00

You see some pretty interesting things at the mall these days. For being a summer day, the mall was pretty dead. Guess that's the economy's fault. The A/C was not working in Belk. That was lovely on today's warm summer day.

But people are interesting. A kid walking through the mall with clothes about 4 sizes too big was also wearing a huge medallion on his gold chain necklace. The medallion was an I-26 logo. Gold rimmed with shiny stones for the lettering. Yeah. That's cool. I want to be just like him.

Then, maybe I'm just a little old fashioned and not comfortable with "Guyliner," but when I went to Belk to check something out, there is a dude working the Lancome counter. Yeah, a dude selling makeup. Now, I feel makeup dumb sometimes, but I think I'd be pretty uncomfortable with a guy applying my makeup or making suggestions. Anyway, on my way back out of the store, as I pass the Lancome counter, the Makeup Dude is lightly applying some of the makeup to his own face. He didn't look like Adam Lambert as it wasn't one of those "WOW! LOOK AT ALL THAT MAKEUP ON THAT GUYS FACE!" It was rather understated, and maybe he was just applying some powder on his face to hid the shine from the lack of A/C in the store... but still, just a little awkward for me. And I image the dozens of gray haired old ladies that seemed to be the only Belk shoppers today that I could see.

The mall always provides entertaining sights. My grandfather taught me when I was young the pleasure of just observing the public. Today, he would have had a few good laughs, too.

We're Called Children of God for a Reason

2009-06-09T16:30:00.003-04:00

I wrote this last month for our MOPS newsletter. Just finally got around to posting it here.

The other day my daughter Katie was upstairs playing in her room while
I folded some laundry. I had to repeatedly tell her some instructions, and after the fourth time of repeating myself, I found myself saying out loud to her in frustration, “How many times do I have to tell you to do this?” Really, honestly, I should have done something differently, but it popped out of my mouth. She just looked at me and finally did what she was supposed to do. UGH! I thought.

And then, I heard it. That small voice of conviction. “Mandi, don’t think that only children can be stubborn or thick-headed. How many times have I had to repeat myself to you?”

Yes, Lord, I thought. I hear you. And in that moment, it struck me, that as God’s child, I am no different than my three year old is with me.

See, I think this is one of the reasons that we are called Children of God. Because when it comes down to it, we are just children. We behave like children; we respond (or don’t respond) like children; we act like children. Think about it, children bicker. Children argue. Children constantly try to assert their independence. But children also have a special capacity for faith. Children are enthusiastic.
Children have a great amount of love. In so many ways, in our spiritual journey, for better or worse, we are children.

I’ve thought through the years as I heard Bible stories told or have read them myself, “Wow! Those Children of Israel sure were stupid! How could they see all the greatness of God and just turn their back on him? “ Or, how could this or that character in the Bible totally disregard God’s instructions? Or why did the Children of Israel whine and gripe so much on their way to the Promised Land? Incredulously to
myself, I think I felt like a grown-up looking down on childishness. But God used that moment with Katie to show me that I, too, am nothing more than His child.

I’d almost guess that when God uses the term “Child” or “Children” to refer to His people and such in the Bible that He probably meant we are closer to Preschool age, then say, Teenagers. Even Paul in I Corinthians 3 talks about the different maturity levels of believers and it was either a spiritual infant on milk or those read for solid food or meat—those who had weaned. And when do we wean children?
During the preschool years. Okay, that might be a bit of stretch, but as Mothers of Preschoolers, I think we can all relate to how children in the preschool years behave.

Taking this a step further, think of what our children need. Our children need guidance. As Christians, no matter what stage in our spiritual journey, we need guidance. That guidance has of course been provided through God’s Word. God’s word is a lamp to light our path and guide us along the way.

Children also need comfort and security. Children don’t like to be alone, some even suffering from separation anxiety. As God’s children, that need is provided for us, too. When Christ was preparing to leave His disciples, I think He could sense that dread of separation they were feeling, and that’s why He told them not to worry, that He was providing a Comforter in the person of the Holy Spirit. How many times when your children are scared do you tell them, “It’s okay, I won’t leave you.” And for as much as we know, in our limited human knowledge, we aren’t going to leave our children. Now, as God’s children, we can take comfort in His promise that “I
will never leave you nor forsake you.” How awesome that we know that promise is guaranteed!

All too often, as we all know too well, children need discipline as well. We don’t like having to punish our children, but it is necessary. Proverbs 3:12 says that the “Lord disciplines those he loves as a father the son he delights in” and this principle is repeated again in I Corinthians 11 and Hebrews 12. We also see time
and again, the Children of Israel suffered punishment, sometimes severe, when they defiantly disobeyed the Lord their God. We may not always like the discipline that He gives, but God loves us just like we love our children. And discipline is necessary to save us from harm or poor choices in the future.

Children also need love. The security of knowing you are loved goes a long way in personal development. And the Bible in Romans 5:8 clearly says that “God demonstrates His own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” And of course we know John 3:16 , and its famous For God so loved the world… Wow! Imagine that. God loves all His children so much that He sacrificed His Son to save us all. And Christ Jesus was willing to suffer through the agony of
crucifixion to save us all. There is no greater love than that.

I am thankful that God opened my eyes up to this new perspective on my relationship with Him, as well as my relationship with my children. Because now that I have been humbled and forced to face my own childishness, I can also hope that I can emulate my Heavenly Father more in the way I relate to my children.

A couple months ago, my darling daughter again had pushed a few of my buttons as two year olds are so expert at doing, and I could feel my frustration simmering. I didn’t want to lose my cool, and I looked up. There on my wall is a plaque. It says, “Love is Patient; Love is Kind” from I Corinthians 13. And I stopped, took a deep breathe and thanked the Lord for such a simple reminder. Of course, we all know
that God is Love. (I John 4:8). So, God, our Father, is patient and kind.

And that’s what I want to strive for even more as a parent. I want to embody the best examples of parenting that God himself provides. Why? Because I want my children to see God through me. That my children become followers of Christ at an early age is important to me because nothing would bring me more “joy than to hear my children walk in truth” (III John 1:4). Peace!

What a Long, Strange Trip It's Been...

2009-06-08T16:44:00.005-04:00

Two Years... when you look back over two years, it is amazing the changes that happen. People grow older, politicians change offices, babies become children, houses appear on lots that were once empty, traffic patterns change, tv shows get cancelled, and the price of gas goes up and down and up and down. Everything changes in two years. Life is not static, and it would be tragic if it were.

But what amazes me is how much *I* have changed in two years.

I'm one of those people that practically grew up born again. Not really, I had my own time when I realized I needed Jesus in my life. I was 4. Literally, 4 years old. So, when I would hear people give testimonies to the great changes that Christ did in their life after they got saved, well, I just sat there unable to understand what they meant. I didn't have that huge life-changing experience because I was 4 when I got saved. No real radical transformation. "Yeah, I stopped talking back to my parents and I stopped throwing my veggies under the table after I got saved" just doesn't compare to the "I stopped doing drugs and sleeping around and robbing banks" kind of testimony. I always felt like I was missing this huge part of the Christian life because I couldn't use that part of my testimony to illustrate to those seeking Christ how I had been radically transformed.

I had lived a blessed life, a charmed life so to speak. Sure there were some struggles growing up; that's just part of life. But overall, bad things never happened to me. I had friends that had drama in their lives, and I joked that I vicariously lived the drama through their lives. But in my own life, bad things didn't happen.

Then, 2 years ago, I had a miscarriage. It ROCKED my world. It shook my faith. I was depressed for several months after it happened. I couldn't wrap my head around what had happened to me for the longest time. If you've been reading this blog for some time or had nothing better to do and read the oldest posts on here, well, you know what it did to me. I chronicled it quite a bit.

But after the darkness lifted, after I got through that very traumatic time, after I realized that it wasn't God that did that horrendous thing to me, but that I just live in a world full of suffering due to the fact that man sinned so long ago, and that I should not count it strange that I was suffering... After months of working through all of that, I started to get better. I then gave birth to my son, and that alone helped heal much of the wound in my spirit.

I got involved in my local MOPS group, even serving on the steering team this last year. I developed friendships that I did not have when I went through my first miscarriage. I got a bit more involved in my church, and I continued to work on my relationship with God.

What I didn't realize was how much God was working in me. When I got pregnant in March, I remember telling a friend that I didn't think I could survive another miscarriage. That the first one devastated me so much, that I just knew I couldn't make it if for some reason I lost baby #4. And then, the unthinkable happened. Just past 11 weeks into my pregnancy, I miscarried. I remember Eric telling me sitting in the doctor's office that he was very worried for me.

But this time, things have been different. Yes, I have been through the rollercoaster of emotions. But throughout it all for the most part, I have had peace. And for the first time in my life I totally understand what is meant by Paul's reference in Philippians 4:7 to the Peace of God that Surpasses all Understanding.

I kinda like how The Message version of the Bible explains that particular verse.

Don't fret or worry. Instead of worrying, pray. Let petitions and praises shape your worries into prayers, letting God know your concerns. Before you know it, a sense of God's wholeness, everything coming together for good, will come and settle you down. It's wonderful what happens when Christ displaces worry at the center of your life.

At this point, I am a totally different person than I was 2 years ago after experiencing the same thing. God has totally brought His peace into my life. His wholeness has settled me down. And I totally know that He does know the plans He has for me and that this was part of it.

And I know that I this time is different because I do have such an awesome support system. Beyond my circle of family and friends that I had last time, I have found myself in an awesome group of women, and the love they have shown... the intercessory prayers on my behalf... the ones that this time aren't afraid to just talk to me and ask me how things are... all of it. God has ordained these women to be in my life at this time, and it has been such a blessing, and I will never be able to thank them properly for the love they have shown.

My faith in prayer was almost shattered after my first miscarriage. And even in the past two years, I struggled with making sense of prayer. But now I totally understand how the prayers that have been lifted up on my behalf have been used to strengthen me and give me the peace that surrounds me.

God has changed me. God has used these two losses to reveal aspects of His character that I just didn't understand previously. Yes, I do have two holes in my heart that will in some way always be there longing to see the babies I have never held this side of Heaven. Don't get me wrong. But throughout this ordeal this past month, I think I have found myself praising God more and listening more to His voice than I would have imagined myself doing.

So, while I don't have this amazing pre-conversion/post-conversion testimony to illustrate how God changes a person, I do have these past two years. I am not the same person I was in April of 2007. And I can be grateful after these long two years that God has worked in my life, even through such trying situations, and changed me. He uses the suffering we experience to refine us. He moves us to places we couldn't have gone without the trials. All things do work together for good (Romans 8:28). We may not understand the how or why for a long time, or maybe even until we are in Heaven with our Creator, but there is a purpose and plan and every detail in our lives is worked into something good. I don't understand totally why I have lost two sweet angels, but this time I do feel the peace of knowing that there is a greater purpose for this happening, and that God is using this to shape me and mold me for something far greater than I can imagine.

And somewhat related, but just part of a song that has been playing in my head today... (Oh, and Cabbage, I hope you are happy that I finally blogged again)

Cry Out to Jesus by Third Day

To everyone who's lost someone they love
Long before it was their time
You feel like the days you had were not enough
when you said goodbye

And to all of the people with burdens and pains
Keeping you back from your life
You believe that there's nothing and there is no one
Who can make it right

There is hope for the helpless
Rest for the weary
Love for the broken heart
There is grace and forgiveness
Mercy and healing
He'll meet you wherever you are
Cry out to Jesus, Cry out to Jesus

Coming Soon...

2009-06-07T23:13:00.003-04:00

More blog posts! I have a million words, sentences, paragraphs, and more stuck in my little brain just dying to get out. I'm suffering a bit from a creativity block, and I'm not sure how I want to proceed, but I promise I'll be writing more soon. If not, I have a few friends that might hunt me down, tie me up in a chair in front of my laptop, and make me write. They seem to find what I have to say interesting... or maybe they just like to laugh at me.

Closed for Remodeling

2009-05-25T22:30:00.002-04:00

I think I'm going to redo all my blog stuff... got a few ideas that will better allow me to organize thoughts, work on some writing projects, and be more topical.

So, until later, this blog is temporarily closed for remodeling.

The Vent?

2009-05-24T15:44:00.003-04:00

I'm a little unsure what to do. Since losing our baby last week, I've had a million-zillion thoughts in my head. There have been so many times I've wanted to blog. I've just wanted to get things out; writing is therapeutic for me. During the course of digitizing my thoughts here in my little corner of the internet, I often ramble, sometimes pontificate, and other times I learn and grow as thoughts gel together and even at times, God reveals new truths to me. This blog, going against all blog-land rules, covers too many topics. Did you know that in the blogosphere, your blogs should be single subject oriented? But here, I cover my family, politics, religion, entertainment, personal interests, and more.

After losing our second little angel, I thought it may be time to segregate my thoughts, and I created another blog - The Vent. My intention was to use this new blog as my place to vent and record my feelings and thoughts stemming from such a devastating loss. It is a private blog, and you'd have to be an invited reader to view it. And I honestly don't think I was going to invite anyone, but more or less keep it my private place for now. Since my blog syndicates to Facebook (something I'm contemplating stopping), I know many of you don't necessarily want to read my more depressing entries. And right now, my heart is torn and the wound is raw, and I don't know if I want everyone reading about all the emotions that I'm feeling. That is of course assuming that people read my blog and/or Facebook notes. I'm pretty private and to just lay it all out for everyone to read... my most intimate thoughts at times, I'm not sure I'm ready to do that.

But, I've had several people tell me they enjoy reading what I write and they've been checking here, on my one and only blog thus far, to see how I'm doing or what I might be learning, etc. So, I'm a little unsure how to proceed. If what I write might help someone else (either going through miscarriage or infant loss or other trouble), than I want to help. After my breakthrough at the beach in 2007 after our first miscarriage, I wrote this:

But I told Him that I expected something good to happen out of all this. And I was ready to be used by Him to help that be accomplished. I just prayed He would give me the wisdom and courage to be used when the time came. But I wanted something good to happen out of the pain. Isn't that what He promises?

So, am I ready and willing to lay my feelings out for the world to see? Am I willing to be that transparent? I'm a very private person... I don't like to let people see me cry. I try to hold my emotions close to the vest, but is that what God wants me to do right now? One of my best friends told me today that perhaps this is what God is preparing me to do - to write for him - to use what some say is a talent and help others. For some reason, the ladies in my MOPS group seem to like the few devotions I've written this year. I don't know. All I know is I told God two years ago that something good had to come out of my loss, my pain, my suffering. And I want that now. And in my venting to God this past week, I've heard Him speak, and He's told me what Phil 1:6 says: For I am confident of this very thing, that He who began a good work in you will perfect it until the day of Christ Jesus.

I don't know what God has in store. I'm still sorting through so much pain, confusion, and grief. Should I keep syndicating this on Facebook? Should I utilize The Vent? Or do I just lay it all out here? I just know I have a lot I need to work through, and it might not be pretty at times. But I can't always talk these things out, and for me, it just helps to get it out through writing.

More than words

2009-05-21T09:18:00.001-04:00

Down this road before...

2009-05-18T12:30:00.002-04:00

Some roads are great for traveling over and over. Others, not so much. And today, I find myself on the road of pain and hurt all over again.

Saw Casting Crowns at the Women of Joy Conference on Saturday night. It's been two years, but Praise You in This Storm still brings tears. The rest of the concert was amazing and a blessing. God has blessed them with such talent and the ability to reach so many with their music.

I woke up yesterday, and that's the start of this most recent journey... and I just have to concentrate on Praise You in This Storm. It's playing over and over in my head. I can't fall into the pit of despair this time. I can't. I have to remember to praise the God who gives... and who takes away.

Am I 33 or 13?

2009-05-15T23:49:00.004-04:00

Went to the Women of Joy conference with my MOPS friends Linda and Wendy. Tonight was just the first day. I'm really tired, so I'll go into the specifics of it all later after the event wraps up.

But, Kirk Cameron spoke tonight. You know, Mike Seaver from Growing Pains? Caleb from Fireproof? He is an awesome man of God!!! He preaches the word and doesn't hold back. Very authentic, too. Great time tonight.

Anyway, afterwards he was signing books, etc and you could get in line to get your picture with him. Well, there was no way the three of us were going to stand in the line... come on, 5000 women there, and probably about half of them used to hang Mike Seaver posters on their walls when they were teenagers. I was never a Kirk Cameron girl. Sure, I thought he was cute, but I had friends who were really into him back in the day.

Well, we didn't stand in line, but instead just walked past the table where he was at, and then we snapped a few pictures. When we got a really good one, in unison, all three of us squealed like a group of 13 year old girls. It was silly and embarrassing but fun all at the same time. I'm pretty sure I'm 33, but for a brief instance tonight, I felt like I was 13.

Containing my Inner Geek

2009-05-09T10:49:00.003-04:00

It's hard to do at times. For much of my life, I've been a sci-fi geek. And for most of that time, I've tried to hide it. I had my geek life, where I went to sci-fi conventions, joined sci-fi clubs, even donned a uniform or two. I practically memorized the Star Trek Compendium, and could tell you what season each of the 79 original Trek episodes belonged to. I had a teen-girl crush on Wil Wheaton of Star Trek: The Next Generation fame. I waited for midnight showings of the Star Wars prequels. I participated in IRC discussions about Star Trek and I could tell you the actual self destruct command sequence for the USS Enterprise.

And then I had my normal, everyday, mundane life. The very large majority of my friends and coworkers and even most family, did not know I was a card-carry member of a sci-fi club. They didn't realize the passion I had for most things sci-fi, but especially Star Trek. I remember once Eric and I got very serious, one night I told him that I needed to really talk. We sat in his car and I told him that I was going to tell him something about myself that I tried to hide and was a bit embarrassed about. The look on his face was ashen. I think he thought I was about to reveal that I had two secret kids and an arrest record or something like that. When I told him I was a huge trek fan, even an officer in a fairly large Star Trek organization, he just laughed. And then he said, "I know that. You liked that stuff in high school." And then I was surprised that I must not have hidden that part of my life as well as I thought. He married me anyway, so he loves me inner geek and all.

Since having kids, though, I kinda did the Paul thing, and "put away childish things." Sure, I still enjoy sci-fi and adored the recently concluded Battlestar Galactica series. But, I left the fandom community, so to speak. Gave up my card-carrying membership in fandom. I had really left trek fandom before this, however, as the latest movies and series just were plain awful. So, it was easy for me to give it up for the most part. Even the new Star Wars movies were highly disappointing. Containing my inner geek became easy.

But, with the new Star Trek movie premiering this week, I have found myself battling my inner geek. I am super excited to see this "reboot" of the Trek genre because from every review I've read it sounds spectacular. You don't even have to be a geek to like it is what most reviewers have said. Entertainment Weekly even went so far to say Star Trek, Not for Geeks Anymore So, I think I felt okay that I wanted to see this movie so badly.

But today, the day I get to go see it, is when I have found the inner geek hard to contain. From what they say, this reboots everything we know about Star Trek. It's a Time Travel story, so something does happen in the story that potentially can change everything we know about the Star Trek universe. And that makes my inner geek nervous. Eric has already laughed at me about this concern of mine. But it's taking something that was such a large part of my life (even if hidden) and changing it. I could really geek out on you here and start to name all the changes that might occur in the 23rd and 24th century but that would be highly embarrassing. I'm trying to contain my inner geek. I really am. But what if something happens and there is no General Order 7, and what if something happens and it changes the timeline and Kirk isn't where he needs to be to save this planet or this civilization or stop Vger or the Whale Probe or allow for peace to occur with the Klingons or prevents Picard from being born or keeps Sisko from being the emmisary? AHAHHAH!!

It's too much to think about, and honestly, it's too much to contain, today. Tomorrow, I'll go back to being the grown up and mom-focused person that I am. But for today, for at least a few hours, I'll suddenly be pulling all sorts of useless knowledge from my head and worrying about the fate of the universe and the 23rd century.

The hits keep on coming

2009-05-06T16:06:00.003-04:00

Honestly, I don't know why stuff that the POTUS and his administration do keep surprising me. You'd think a conservative like me by now would be numb to everything by now. But, I'm not. It's like a bad dream I can't wake up from.

Here's just a few from the last few days.

Michael Barone in the Washington Examiner discusses how bankruptcy law has been basically thrown aside in order to appease the UAW in the Chrysler case. Is GM next?

A close to total disregard of the National Day of Prayer from the Washington Times.

The Department of Homeland Security, in a follow up to their Greatest Hits Volume 1, aka the Brief on Rightwing Extremists, have now issued Greatest Hits Volume 2, a Domestic Extremism Lexicon. They have kinda taken a step back from it, but still, it was compiled and issued. Some of the great lines from it involve an underhanded attack at "alternative media" (Read: Conservative blogs), abortion foes, etc. At least it did address some of the anarchists and left-wing nut jobs, too, this time.

And don't get me started on the potential Cap & Trade energy plan that will be detrimental to working families, the Democrats protecting pedophiles (SCUM OF THE EARTH) in a hate crimes bill, oh, the way the media fawns over Obama like he's a rock star, and so much more. It's just depressing at times to even read news or listen to the TV. When will it end?

A Big Red Done Stamp....

2009-05-05T23:23:00.003-04:00

I used to love watching Monster House on Discovery, hence the reference to the big red done stamp...

Anyway, it's time to put that stamp on J's days as a nursling. He self-weaned for good. He nursed a little last week because he was sick, but as soon as he got better, he was done with it for good. No looking back for him. But a lot of mixed emotions for me. K self-weaned so well... almost textbook. It allowed for me to mentally prepare for it. J on the other hand, just was done. Plain and simple. I kept offering and he didn't care. And I always promised myself that I would nurse as long as my children wanted to nurse, and no longer. I don't want to be the mom that breastfeeds because I have a need.

So, for now, my nursing days are over. At least for a while... Sigh.

An Iron Fist in a Velvet Glove

2009-05-04T18:15:00.003-04:00

I just have to share this link to a great blog about Margaret Thatcher. She took office as Prime Minister 30 years ago yesterday.

Mike's America post on Margaret Thatcher

Kids say the darndest things

2009-05-04T08:38:00.003-04:00

Having children of my own, I can fully attest to the things that children say. Here's a few snippets of K's greatest hits these past few weeks.

After realizing that little girls don't have breasts, but they will when they grow up: "One day when I'm a real big girl and one day when I'm older, I'm going to have big boobies and I'll be able to nurse J." It's hard not to laugh, really. I told her that she might be able to nurse her own babies but when she's bigger and older, J will be, too, and won't be nursing then. She looked at me like, Whatever!

When explaining to K what the rings on my left hand mean: "One day I'm going to be married and have rings just like that! And then I'm going to have a Blue Vette. And I'm going to drive it everywhere. And Daddy can have one just like me and drive with me!" I had to tell Eric that one right away. Considering my husband drools over every Corvette he sees, he was pleased to hear K's prognostication that he will one day have one.

And the kicker (there actually is another funny one, but Eric would kill me if I put it here online for the world to read), so I'll end with this one. K and J are in the bath the other night. J stands up and is banging on the wall having fun. He suddenly begins to peepee into the bath water. K looks and proclaims, "Mommy, there's water coming out of J's peanut!" We've been trying to teach her the proper name for body parts, and well, I guess to her it sounds like peanut. They'll just love this story when they both get older... :)

An Important Week in my Adventures in Motherhood

2009-04-19T21:49:00.005-04:00

Okay, a break from the political diatribes. Time to focus on something that is positive and uplifting. And that is this week in my life, specifically my adventure in motherhood. So many memories of this week in my life over the last three years. Mostly all good, some bittersweet.

April 19, 2006 - My eldest child was born. K entered this world shortly after 2 a.m. three years ago today! I can't believe my baby girl is 3 already! She has changed so much and she has brought so much joy to my life. I NEVER imagined motherhood would complete me as much as it has. My purpose, my calling in life all became clear when I got pregnant with K, and especially once I held her in my arms. Granted, I have never worked as hard as I have the past 3 years, either. All the work experience I had in the medical office, insurance field, IT field, and sales, well, it was NOTHING compared to the 24/7/365 that is motherhood. But I wouldn't trade it for ANYTHING. I love my life, and K is such an amazing little person. She daily amazes me with little things, big things, and she helps me see the wonder of the world that we adults forget exists. She is smart as a whip, but I feel that I'm the one that is learning... learning so much about myself because of her. I thank God for entrusting her to me. She is a blessing, and I pray I can be the kind of mother to her that mine was to me.

April 22, 2008 - My baby boy was born. I can't believe J is going to be ONE already! This past year has flown! He is such a great baby. Laid back, happy almost all the time, such a great smile. He just got his first hair cut, and he looks like such a little man now. He's starting to self wean, which makes me a little sad. I nursed K for 15 months and had hoped to at least get that far with J. But he's an active little boy and is always on the go. We only nurse in the morning and most nights at bedtime. Because of his food allergies, I've been on a restricted diet, too. I've had so many people act astonished that I would continue to nurse while having to avoid certain foods. But, to me, that's part of motherhood. You sacrifice sometimes to do what is best for your kids. For me, if I have to give up some tasty treats and favorite foods to ensure that J gets to continue receiving mommy's milk, then so be it. But something tells me I won't have to worry about it much longer... if he's nursing a month from now, I'd be surprised. He's growing up so quickly!

April 18-24, 2007 - This is the 2nd most life changing event I've experienced. The first was of course the birth of my daughter a year prior to this. This event, however, would change me forever. A surprise pregnancy ended with losing the baby. The pain has dulled over time, but at times, it still gets me. Today at church, the song I Will Rise by Chris Tomlin just struck me and the pain felt fresh at first. It's only because of the time of the year, I know that. But then I felt God's comforting hand during the song as well... When we sang the lyrics "And I hear the voice of many Angels sing, 'Worthy is the Lamb.' And I hear the cry of every longing heart, 'Worthy is the Lamb'" I just knew my baby was up in Heaven right at that very moment worshiping God, one of those very voices shouting and singing "Worthy is the Lamb!" And I know that one day, one glorious day, I will meet that precious little one, but for now, my baby is in the very presence of my Savior and my God! Wow!

And that's what makes that experience so life changing because through the anger and pain, I grew, and I realized that God's plan for my life was so incredibly different than what I wanted, and I'm fine with that now. I wouldn't have J if that pregnancy had not ended, and I can't imagine life without my baby boy.

What an amazing time of the year for me. I celebrate the birth of my two babies. And I celebrate the future reunion I'll have with my little angel up in Heaven. I am so blessed to have had those three lives intersect with mine while living this life God gave me. I'm looking forward to the future and what it holds as I continue my adventure in motherhood.

If you don't know the song, take a moment and listen. Chris Tomlin is an amazing song writer.

From Conspiracy to Extremism

2009-04-14T16:09:00.003-04:00

In 1998, Hillary Clinton said that a "Vast right-wing conspiracy" was out to get her husband. This was during the midst of the Lewinsky scandal. Here's a quick clip of it.

We conservatives proudly took that smear as a fun label. I even got the coffee mug from my subscription to the Limbaugh Letter that proclaimed me a Proud Member of the Vast Right Wing Conspiracy (just as a side note, it was stolen off my desk at work. My dad contacted the Rush Limbaugh show and told them, and they sent me a replacement one for free! Who says the man is evil?!).

Fast forward 11 years. Conservatives are no longer just part of a conspiracy to smear a president! Now, the Department of Homeland Security has labeled us EXTREMISTS!

In a document from DHS, this is stated:

* (U) Rightwing extremism in the United States can be broadly divided into those groups, movements, and adherents that are primarily hate-oriented (based on hatred of particular religious, racial or ethnic groups), and those that are mainly antigovernment, rejecting federal authority in favor of state or local authority, or rejecting government authority entirely. It may include groups and individuals that are dedicated to a single issue, such as opposition to abortion or immigration.

Okay, so because I am someone that believes in limited government... and because I am OPPOSED to abortion... I am an extremist. "Dedicated to a single issue" makes me an extremist? But only if it goes against the wishes of the current regime in Washington? So, because I'm pro-life, I'm an extremist. If I were rabidly pro-abortion, I'd be a patriot? NARAL members are patriots. National Right to Life members are extemists. Because I'm pro-gun, I'm an extemist. But if I were a gun control advocate, I'd be a patriot? Brady Campain good. NRA bad.

What in the world?!?! And this is right on the heels of the Missouri Information Analysis Center report warning that militias may be on the rise and you can profile those members by looking for the following: Ron Paul bumper stickers, Bob Barr bumper stickers, or "Right to Carry" handgun stickers. Oh, and Christians, "sovereign citizens", those opposed to abortion, tax revisionists, and anti-illegal immigrant advocates are potential would-be terrorists. The State of Missouri has since backpedaled on this, but still... it shows the thinking that is out there right now.

Basically, what the current powers that be are trying to ingrain in the minds of the great unwashed is that Conservative = Extremist. All those Tea Party attendees (I'm hoping to go tomorrow)... well, they are Extremist. I could go on an on about this, but I think I'm making my point here.

Persecution, well, it's not far behind.

UPDATE: Read Michelle Malkins take on this on her blog. She quotes even more about the document.

Ministry of Truth - Just Wait

2009-04-08T23:58:00.004-04:00

One of my all-time favorite books is George Orwell's 1984. I just finished re-reading it. And it all seems so... so... so very current.

Especially today as I read this. The White House is DENYING that Obama bowed to the Saudi Crown Prince. Obama states that he is merely shaking with both hands and just "dipping" a little.

Watch this video.

At 0:05 you can see Obama BOWING to the Saudi Prince. Not shaking hands with both hands. One hand is CLEARLY down near his knee. Obama may be taller, but how many people shake hands by lowering their head BELOW the other persons? For crying out loud this is a BOW!

And in case you didn't pause it at the time, here's a screen capture I took and CIRCLED the hand that is not being used in the two-handed shake. So, does Obama have three hands? Is that what they expect us to believe?

No. They really, really expect the American people to fall for whatever they say. They want to use a Ministry of Truth tactic (1984 reference for those unsure of what I meant). Sure, we remember seeing something, but they will say the opposite, and expect everyone to just accept it. It doesn't really matter. Just believe what you're told and shut up be a good citizen. Why? Because Oceania has always been at war with Eastasia.... Eurasia... wait, no, Eastasia. How silly of me to even question what the Party says.

We the People...

2009-03-26T11:05:00.002-04:00

Some of the most beautiful words in the history of nations...

We the people of the United States, in order to form a more perfect union, establish justice, insure domestic tranquility, provide for the common defense, promote the general welfare, and secure the blessings of liberty to ourselves and our posterity, do ordain and establish this Constitution for the United States of America.

Now, sadly, if we just had leaders who understood what that was all about. Instead they have their own self-serving interests. Democrats and Republicans alike. The whole system has so much corruption in it. Sadly, I don't know if we'll ever be able to reclaim those founding principles because too many people are just fat and happy and don't realize what we're slowly losing.

I love this video. If I could I would give thunderous applause and a standing ovation!

Pray for a sweet little boy

2009-03-19T23:22:00.002-04:00

A friend of mine from MOPS needs your prayers. Her 3 year old little boy was hit by a truck today. He is about to have surgery, and he has an occipital fracture, a contusion on his lung, an injury to his airway, and his liver enzymes are elevated, so they are afraid he may have liver damage (hence the surgery, I presume). He is at MUSC Children's Hosptial. Please pray for them during this time.

Also, they asked that we pray for the neighbor that hit him. He is unsaved and has been going through a bit of a rough patch in life already. Praying that God uses this for His glory!

The Motherwear Breastfeeding Blog: Have questions about medications? Use these resources.

2009-03-09T09:24:00.003-04:00

The Motherwear Breastfeeding Blog: Have questions about medications? Use these resources.

Posted using ShareThis

Just a good article that points you to good resources so women don't have to always "pump and dump," much of which is unnecessary.

Going to Chuch

2009-02-24T10:01:00.004-05:00

In my internet travels, I happened upon a church website. It is of IFB persuasion (that's Independent Fundamental Baptist for the great unwashed among my readers). The slogan on their website stated proudly, "It's a place where going to Church is still like going to Church!" I'm assuming they said this due to the previous statement of they are Bible-preaching (a good thing) and that they sing "time-tested hymns.... with enthusiasm" (not a bad thing, either).

Now, as anyone who has either read my blog from the beginning (that amounts to 1 total person I think) or those who may have gone back and read previous entries, I am a lover of all things hymn related. I even wrote a post about it last year. From that entry, I stated,

Don't get me wrong. I LOVE the music at my church. I think it is pretty high quality in fact. But sometimes, I think that as we're integrating in the new worship music, which I LOVE to listen, we also can't forget the heritage of hymns that have so sustained the Christian church for so long. And we don't have to sing them like a funeral dirge or even with organ music (gahhh... organ music). I think many current, contemporary Christian artists are also realizing that we can't just ignore hundreds of years of worship music history. From Martin Luther to Isaac Watts to Fanny Crosby to the Gaithers to Chris Tomlin... the church has such an amazing history of Worship Music.

I also said,

These songs are essential to the modern church. To paraphrase a hymn title, they are the ties that bind. It was what kept church across this country and the world even unified to a point. You could visit any church, take out a hymnal, and pretty much know the tune or the words. Baptist, Methodist, Pentecostal, no Denomination, but the music was basically the same.

So, I again, I love me some hymns. But, for this church (and others in the IFB movement) to seem to think that because they sing only hymns (and enthusiastically at that!) they keep church more like "church" that's just wrong.

Seriously, "It's a place where going to Church is still like going to Church" begs the question... what is going to Church? You mean back in the times of the Early Church? Did they have an opening hymn, a welcome from the pastor and prayer, a few songs, a choir special, an offering, a sermon, and then an invitation and closing prayer? What about our brothers and sisters who met secretly in homes in the Soviet states? I don't really see anywhere in the scriptures where it says WHAT a church service must include?

What about those that don't use hymnals, but instead use a powerpoint display on a wall-mounted screen? Do I have to stare at a hymnal for church to be "still like going to Church"? And what hymns should I sing? Can I sing some of the newer hymns? Which ones are proper and deemed to fit in the "still like going to church mold?" I've been in IFB church services and heard a soloist sing a song by a Christian Contemporary artist (although it was snuck in and sang to Piano accompaniment). I even heard the members of that church "enthusiastically" shout "Amen!" at the end of said song.

Church worship has evolved so much over the years. At one point Christianity didn't have the hymns so many traditional churches sing now. Was that in the "still like going to Church" mold?

My church must not be like going to church. We don't sing hymns alone... we tend to have more of the Praise song vibe going on. But, we do sing those enthusiastically! We don't have just the piano and organ thing, either. We have (GASP!) drums, even! On display... on the platform... the same place the pastor preaches! Oh and he doesn't always wear a tie. And we don't have a traditional "offering collection" either, and sometimes, we don't always do an invitation. Oh, and we don't have deacons, we have elders. Oh, and we don't have Baptist in our name, either.

But, I dare ANYONE to tell me that my church is wrong. I dare anyone to say that going to my church is not like going to church. My church sees souls saved regularly, and my church has awesome ministries that reach out to the community (such as a rockin' MOPS group - shameless plug) , and I have met some of the Godliest people I have ever known in my church. I have people I can turn to when I need prayer, and I know they are full-blown prayer warriors. I have felt conviction during sermons. I have gone forward in a service, even - stepping out of my comfort zone. I have cried tears during worship feeling God's comfort as I was going through such a painful trial. I have seen church members go through back-breaking trials and stay true to God as His faithfulness is the only thing that sustained them. So don't tell me that going to my type of church is not like going to church.

I am not going to judge anyone's particular style of worship. If you want traditional, good for you. If that helps you, good for you. But don't think that your style of worship is superior or ordained by God and that mine is not just because it is different. You are going to be really surprised when you get to Heaven and Chris Tomlin or Lincoln Brewster or Darlene Zschech is leading worship along with Fanny Crosby, George Beverly Shae, Bill Gaither, and Handel.

Bottlefeeding In Public!

2009-02-18T23:47:00.003-05:00

I found this on Breastfeeding123, a nursing blog I try to read regularly. This was not written by me, but by the author of Breastfeeding123, Angela White. I just had to repost because it is so funny!

Anti-Bottlefeeding Coalition Denounces Eating Freely
Listen up people! There has been another sighting of Bottlefeeding In Public (BIP)! Some customers complained to management, but management said BIP was protected by law. So it’s time to get personal. It’s time to launch the Anti-Bottlefeeding Coalition Denounces Eating Freely Campaign (the ABCDEF Campaign for short). Modern society cannot tolerate babies eating from bottles in public! Whether you breastfeed or bottlefeed in the privacy of your own home, in the name of all that is decent, modest, and right, prepare yourself to make the following arguments against BIP:

BIP is unsanitary! You don’t know what’s in that bottle! It could be formula, it could be breast milk, and it could be unsanitary! Who knows whether that bottle was properly prepared. Fight disease, fight BIP!

BIP leads to spitting up! Bottlefeeding a baby in public can lead to copious amounts of spit up. What if a baby spits up and ruins the carpeting or furniture upholstery in a business? You don’t think those Bottlefeeding Parents are going to offer to pay, do you?

BIP leads to, um, other things! Bottlefeeding may be natural, but so is urinating and defecating and you wouldn’t urinate or defecate in public, would you? And what’s worse is bottlefeeding leads to urinating and defecating!

BIP is done to get attention! Be aware, be prepared! Bottlefeeding Parents might try to argue that BIP is done for the baby who needs to eat, but that baby doesn’t need to eat! Bottlefeeding Parents are just doing it for the attention! They whip out that bottle, and sometimes they hold the bottle in full view, including the nipple!

BIP can be done in the bathroom! If a baby really needs to eat, that baby can be fed in the bathroom, preferably in a stall while the Bottlefeeding Parent sits on the toilet. And the Bottlefeeding Parent can eat there too.

BIP should be done under a blanket! Carry a blanket with you at all times so you can offer it to the Bottlefeeding Parent to cover up. If you’re really feeling bold, throw that blanket over the baby without asking! It doesn’t matter if it’s hot under there. It doesn’t matter if the baby can’t see. It doesn’t matter if the baby doesn’t like the blanket. Bottlefeeding should be covered for the comfort of others nearby.

BIP must be discrete. I mean discreet. Discrete? Anyway. I’ll get back to you on this one when I figure out the difference between the usage of discreet and discrete. All I know is Bottlefeeding Parents should have the common courtesy of using discretion.

BIP uses bottles for the wrong purpose. Lots of people are under the mistaken impression that bottles are for feeding babies. We know that bottles are other people’s play toys. Keep bottlefeeding at home so people don’t get the wrong idea!

Ready to join the campaign? Then put on your Parenting Police badge and get out there!

Sponsored post: This post brought to you by “If You Think This Isn’t a Joke Then You’re Off Your Rocker” and the ABCDEF Campaign.

Honestly, I found this quite amusing. Especially in light of the lady getting asked to leave a Denny's in Asheville because she was Nursing in Public. Oh, and there is a nationwide nurse-in planned at Dennys Sunday, February 22 @ 1pm.

Feeding Can Be A Wonderful Way of Expressing Love

2009-02-08T22:59:00.004-05:00

Okay, so I grew up watching Mr. Rogers on the local PBS station. I really loved the show as a small kid. I mainly remember only two real episodes: the one with the Hulk and the one with the lady who played the Wicked Witch from Wizard of Oz.

I wish I remembered this one! This is the coolest Mr Rogers ever (at least to the adult me). He talks about breastfeeding, and shows a montage of all sorts of mammals nursing their young, including people! Facebook would ban this video due to it showing too much skin probably, but I think it's awesome. If you are a prude, don't watch it. But if you realize, that like Mr. Rogers says, "Feeding can be a wonderful way of expressing love," then this is just a beautiful video! I'll thank him for this segment when I see him in Heaven one day.

FT.com / Companies - Google and Nasa back new school for futurists

2009-02-03T11:12:00.003-05:00

FT.com / Companies - Google and Nasa back new school for futurists

Posted using ShareThis

Okay, so are we heading for the Matrix? Or Skynet? The machines are gonna take over!

'They're doing well': Miracle survival of mother's EIGHT babies born in just five minutes | Mail Online

2009-01-27T14:28:00.002-05:00

'They're doing well': Miracle survival of mother's EIGHT babies born in just five minutes | Mail Online

Posted using ShareThis

My favorite thing in this article is this line...

The mother plans to breastfeed all eight babies, her doctors said.

Wow, you know that I am a major lactivist and desire that every mother breastfeed, but wow! Someone who plans to nurse *8* babies!!! That lady rocks! It's hard enough to nurse one sometimes, let alone eight! You go girl!

Quarantined!

2009-01-26T19:42:00.005-05:00

Quarantined... that's the way I feel we've been the past couple weeks. Honestly, this has been some of the worst sicknessness we've had in a long time. Here's the course of events... (If you have a weak stomach, don't bother reading this one... full of sickness stories - and if you have young children you know what that can mean).

January 8 I started getting a sinus infection. Felt pretty miserable most of that weekend, even missing church. The sinus stuff hung on for a week. Meanwhile, I had to get ready for a MOPS Steering retreat. That was January 16-17. Going to Edisto to a beach house to have fellowship, plan, and bond further as a team. I was SOOOO looking forward to the time with the ladies and my little man. Meanwhile, January 15, K starts to get the sniffles and runny nose.

The MOPS retreat started by all of us ladies going to eat at a little Italian place in Summerville. I got the Alfredo, and honestly I was underwhelmed with it. I didn't even eat a third of it. It was kinda blah. Well, the night of January 16, right after getting to Edisto and getting unpacked... I start vomiting. And then the other end of my plumbing started acting up too. I honestly have never had a stomach bug this aggressive, so I assumed it was food poisoning. It was that terrible... I threw up at least 8 times that night. Meanwhile, I'm having to try and care for my baby boy. Nursing him in the middle of the night, trying not to wake him up all the many times I had to run to the bathroom. It was just an awful night. And I wasn't at home... and that made it worse. Yes, this is a pity party for me. I debated in my head just packing up the boy and me and going home. But I figured an hour drive home would probably take 2 hours with all the stopping I'd have to do along the way to find a bathroom or vomit. So, I suffered instead at the freezing cold beach house in Edisto (did I mention that this was the night that the chill factor was supposed to be down to single digits?).

I also felt incredibly inadequate as a mother that night and the next day. Had it not been for my MOPS sisters pitching in taking care of J and giving up the bedroom so I could have some solitude... well, I wouldn't have made it. I slept most of the Saturday away... staying awake as much as I could for some planning meetings... but I really missed out on the free time to further bond with the wonderful women on the steering team, and I really regret that. I'm a very slow friend-maker (for a myriad of reasons that I don't feel like blogging about right now), so every chance I get to know people, I try to take it.

Anyway, I felt good enough to drive home late that evening but had to miss out on the going-home dinner with everyone. Got home, put J to bed and collapsed into the bed until early next morning. Meanwhile I still was having personal plumbing problems, but at least the vomiting had stopped. I still was thinking this was food poisoning...

But alas it wasn't. Monday January 19 was MLK day so Eric had the day off from work. K was still suffering from a bad cold, and J was not sleeping well, so Eric stayed and worked from home on January 20. That night... well, he started having plumbing problems as well as vomiting. So, that means I did not have food poisoning, but was instead visited by one of the most violent stomach bugs EVER.

At least by this point, I was feeling better - no more sinus stuff or stomach stuff.

Eric, however, was in bad shape, suffering from the stomach bug. The plumbing issues hung around for him through Friday January 23. And he, too, has never been as sick as he was during this time. Just an awful bug.

Meanwhile, J starts to get a snotty nose... Yeah. The grandparents take the kids for a day so I can sterilize my house - it was almost like spring cleaning. I cleaned so well, used so much bleach, and about a can of Lysol. I tried desperately to eradicate the germs so the kids wouldn't get sick.

Now, come Thursday (22nd) night, I'm going to bed... just turned the light off, and heard "BLADDHDSSSHHHLLLLLCCCCKKK" over the monitor. From K's room. I call to Eric to come upstairs and we go into K's room. Vomit all over her. Great... the stomach bug visited her, too. And well, we get her into the bath, clean her off and get her downstairs in the playroom on her little fold out bed. I didn't want her vomiting all over her room again, and it was the most comfortable place for all of us. She ended up throwing up about 4 times more until around 2am she finally fell asleep. The next day she had some diarrhea once, but overall seemed to be better.

Well, Saturday morning we awake to K with poopy socks because as she climbed out of her bed, she had the runs again, and stepped all in it.. and I had a pile of poo to clean up off the floor. I felt like Mike Rowe from Dirty Jobs. It was the grossest thing I have ever cleaned up. I still want to steam clean her carpet, but I know it's clean already...

J meanwhile is now into a full blown cold. His first really bad one. Thank the good Lord for thinking of breastfeeding and all the benefits from it - especially the antibodies that are passed on. He has yet to get the stomach bug, even though he's been all around the 3 of us who had it. I'd like to see formula keep a baby from getting a virus. :) He did vomit once while I was feeding him because he is so snotty he was choking on the stuff running down his throat and it got his gag reflex.

K still is battling the diarrhea. Had another fun one today to clean up. J's nose is still like a faucet left open it's running so much. And today is January 26. It has been 2.5 weeks. And I've never cleaned up so much bodily fluids as I have the past couple of weeks. I'm exhausted from lack of sleep... I'm so ready for this to be over. So very, very ready. This has just been an incredibly long month. I've barely been out of the house between all the sickness. I had to miss a fun MOPS activity last week, and I'm missing one tonight. Fellowship with other moms and ladies I'd like to get to know better.

Anyway, this was my little pity party blog entry. Time for me to play a little with K before bedtime. Eric is still at work. Hopefully he'll be home soon... And praying we'll all be better soon.

Questions I Need Answered

2009-01-23T00:38:00.005-05:00

Yesterday, my baby boy turned 9 months old. So hard to believe he's growing up so quickly. And in this blog in the past few months, especially leading up to the election, I outlined why becoming a mother changed my political views . I have gone from being nominally pro-life to fervently pro-life. I'm actually trying to think of how strong an adjective I can put in front of pro-life... and I can't think of one right now...

And it just so happens that the day my boy turned 9 months, it marked the 36th anniversary since the Supreme Court decided Roe V Wade. I was reading this blog on Redstate.com and it just really brought the issue to a forefront with me.

I could find little, very little joy, in the inauguration of President Obama this past week. Yes, we had a peaceful transfer of power. Yes, it was wonderful to know that a glass ceiling of sorts had been broken. Yes, he has adorable children. But that's about all I could think of to be joyful about.

To me it was the day that marked fear and trepidation in me regarding the future of the sanctity of life. I could get on my soapbox and repeat all the talking points regarding abortion, partial birth abortion, etc. But I will spare you that for now.

But I do have some questions I need answered. I hope that you will realize that these are coming from my heart.

If you consider yourself pro-life did you vote for Obama knowing he promised Planned Parenthood that he would do all he could to get the Freedom of Choice Act passed?

And did you know what the Freedom of Choice Act stood for?
I have many African-American friends that I consider to be strong Christians. And they all claim to be pro-life. I haven't asked them this yet because I understand why it is so important to see a person of color in the White House. But is Obama's race more important than so many other issues?

I guess I just need to understand the reasoning behind the vote for Obama - someone so stridently opposed to pro-life principles. His record stands as such. His speeches stand as such. It was out there for all to see. What was the reasoning? My heart breaks to think about the holocaust of abortion, let alone that we may be on the precipice of legalizing the barbaric and horrific practice of partial-birth abortion. Please, help me understand this.

CVS Trip

2009-01-22T16:45:00.004-05:00

Just got back from CVS. Starting to use my ECB's again. So, I got to use $7.50 today in Extra Care Bucks. Paid $14 for $21.50 in pepsi-co products. And earned another $10 in ECBs. Yeah, me! All in our effort to save more money/spend wisely this year.

While at CVS, I was accosted in the parking lot by some Jehovah's Witnesses. This is the second time in downtown Summerville that I've had them try to distribute literature to me. The guy totally caught me off guard as I was loading my sodas in the back of the van. So, I couldn't think of what I really wanted to say to him. He tried to hand me a Watchtower magazine. I told him firmly that I wasn't interested, and he backed off immediately. Next time I think I'll tell one of them, "Well, daily I'm a witness to Jehovah's goodness." ;-)

2009-01-12T08:35:00.003-05:00

Just a shout out and advertisement for Michelle Edwards Photography. She's here in Summerville and does beautiful work... doesn't that family look like they are really enjoying themselves at their photo shoot?

Seriously, Michelle does great work, and we had a blast doing ours back in November. It was miserably cold outside, but that really only bothered Jonah. Poor guy was wondering what we were doing out there.

Anyway, if you are looking for a photo experience that is totally not one of those studio places like Sears, Pennys, or Portrait Innovations, consider using Michelle. She does amazing work. Check out her site and view the different galleries. Beautiful photography, and even a few people you might recognize! :-)

The Cost of Cheese

2009-01-06T15:52:00.003-05:00

So, the husband and I are at Sonic today getting lunch. I've noticed this in the past, and we talked about it today, so hence this blog post...

At Sonic, their menu says I can add certain items to any regular menu item. One of those is American Cheese. It is .50 a slice.

So, let's say I get the #1 - a Sonic Burger. I think it was around $4.49 for the combo. If I want to add cheese (it's just a hamburger), it will cost me $.50 to add it. Okay, that's cool.

But say I want a #2 - the Supersonic Cheeseburger. I'm getting one for my mom, for example, who prefers her burgers without cheese. So, I ask for a #2 with no cheese. The cost for that combo was $6.19. If I get it without cheese, it is still $6.19. But wait, doesn't that cheese cost $.50 a slice? Shouldn't they take $1.00 off the price of the burger (it has 2 slices of cheese) if I get it sans cheese?

No... none of the burger places that charge for cheese subtract the price of cheese if you get something without it. And you know, that just doesn't seem fair, does it? If they are going to charge me for cheese, then they need to not charge for it if I don't get cheese.

Eric thinks I need to write Sonic about this and ask what their corporate policy is. They will probably think I'm nuts. And if I actually asked the local Sonic about it, I'd probably get some blank stares.

Just a thought... crazy, I know, but I think it's a pretty valid point...

Randomness

2008-12-30T09:49:00.006-05:00

So much has happened this past week! Christmas is such a busy time of year! I've had a million different things run through my head that I've wanted to blog about, but alas, I only have so many hours in a day. Even now, I probably won't get half of the stuff down. I think some of the more "devotional" ideas I'll work on and post later. Some of the other deeper topics may never get covered just because life is busy and sometimes I just don't get a decent amount of time to sit down at the keyboard and let the thoughts spill out of my mind. When is google coming out with that neural implant so that I can blog while thinking? Hey, don't laugh, I wouldn't be surprised at anything google comes out with. But some of my best ideas do come during quiet moments nursing J or in the shower or just as I'm drifting to sleep at night. Of course none of those "best" ideas make it hear. Hence the drivel you have to suffer through if you are one of the 2.5 readers I have. :-)

Anyway, thank you to everyone who commented or emailed me about Hootie. I miss the poor little guy. We did explain to K about Hootie's passing. She has spent the last two days at my parents house. On Sunday before we took her she actually said something about Hootie. So, Eric and I told her that Hootie got really sick and that he died. That he was in doggy heaven and that Jesus was watching out for him up there (Don't dare judge me on the theology behind that last part - none of us know for sure what happens to beloved pets). We also told her that because of that Hootie wouldn't be at Granny and Granddad's anymore. She got really serious looking for a minute and then just hugged her daddy really tightly. After about another minute she wanted down and was off to play. So, we weren't really sure if she understood or not. When we got to my parents house to drop her off, she didn't say anything or ask about the dog. But here's the kicker. My dad hadn't the heart to pick up Hootie's food and water bowl yet. So, when K saw Hootie's food bowl with food still in it, she asked my mom, "Who eats this?" My mom thought she was saying Hootie eats this. So she explained that was dog food. K then repeated and looked confused, "Who eats this?" Then it hit my mom - K had totally understood that Hootie was gone and was wondering why dog food was still out when there was no dog. So, that spurred my parents on to removing the bowls. I'm not sure if K is normal for her age, but I think it's kinda smart for a 2.5 year old to understand what we told her.

The last two days have been quiet without K around. And I miss her so much! But Eric and I had a chance to go on a date and see a movie. We saw Marley and Me. I had read the book, but Eric had not. It was such a great movie, and it was mostly faithful to the book. It had all the good moments of the book - the memorable ones. When I read the book was back in 2007, it was right at the time of my miscarriage. MINOR SPOILER ALERT. What was so interesting was I read the part of the book about the Grogan's miscarriage just about a week after mine, and it was so similar - about 9 weeks pregnant and then the loss. The ache and tears afterward. Even though it was painful to read then, it was therapeutic. Here we are now - Dec 08, so far removed from April 07. But when that portion of the movie came, whew... it just hit me like a ton of bricks again, and I cried. But what was special was the way that Eric took my hand and held and caressed it during the whole scene. And then, as the movie went to the next scene, I saw him wipe a small tear from his eye, too. We haven't even spoken about that moment, but it meant so much to me. Men don't often talk about how they feel after a pregnancy loss. So, it was just a special moment.

The rest of the movie was just great. Laughing out loud for many parts, and crying during others. The end of the movie had the entire theatre in tears. I've never heard so much sniffling in a theatre before. And I couldn't help but think of my two dogs that are no longer with us... especially Hootie after having him put to sleep just last week. Again, a great movie. I was disappointed that they threw it a few obscenities as they really weren't necessary, but overall, a good show.

Eric and I also got to see Facing the Giants FINALLY. Now I can return it to our friends who let us borrow it. Wow, a great movie. I think I may actually have liked it more than Fireproof. Then again, it was a football movie, and I'm a sucker for a good sports movie. I absolutely love what Sherwood Baptist Church is doing with this Hollywood-style ministry. If I lived in Albany GA, I would so be part of it... how exciting to be able to produce quality movies and reach so many people with positive, uplifting, scriptural messages! So many people put down movie making and lump it in with the devils tools, but this shows how they are reclaiming movie making for God! Yes, some of the acting is what I would call soap-opera caliber, but the stories are just so good, that you can get past that. They do a nice blend of mixing in humor as well, and I even think the musical scores are right up there with the majority of movies.

Christmas itself was good. As always I enjoyed the family gatherings. At Eric's Aunt Mae's pre-Christmas luncheon, everyone finally got to meet J. And then at my family's Christmas Eve party, J got a second round of introductions. And I really enjoy seeing extended family that we don't always get to see. Then, Christmas day rolled around and my house was stocked full of toys again! God blesses my children and I just feel that there must be some way to give back. So, many of our lightly used toys I want to find somewhere to donate them. They still have a lot of good life left in them and I want other kids to be blessed with them as well. I could list the tons of gifts that K and J got, but I honestly don't have the time for anything that long. Suffice to say my kids are loved. It was fun to see K get so excited about Christmas this year. And she was sweet in helping J open his presents. Of course, she plays with all his stuff, too. Likewise, he chews on all her stuff. It is so great to see my kids interact and play with each other. Can't wait to see more of that as they get older.

Well, gotta wrap this up. J will be up soon and I still have to shower! Then off to pick up my baby girl!

Hootie and Me

2008-12-25T00:03:00.004-05:00

Dec 23rd brought the unexpected. My parents dachshund Hootie had to be put to sleep. Technically, he was my dog. I got him intending to take him with me when I graduated college and moved out or got married or whatever led me to leave the comforts of Casa Herrmann. But, the other dog we had named "Q" was sick with cancer when I finally got married to Eric in 2000. Q and Hootie were best buds and we all felt that if Hootie were to leave, it would just accelerate the cancer and Q would have to be put down sooner. So, Hootie remained with my parents and gradually became their dog.

When Q finally lost his battle with cancer 3 years ago, Hootie was the lone dog in their house, so I think my dad got even more attached to him. My mom and Hootie had a love/hate relationship. She was good to him, but he did a lot of things that really irritated her. Hootie was stubborn. Hootie would occasionally show his temper. He was a dachshund, what do you expect?

But he was loyal, and sweet, and I remember getting him as a puppy. I actually had picked a different puppy out of the litter. The puppies came from some family and their dogs. But one day when we were at the house and I was playing with the puppies, I picked one up in their kitchen. Cute as a button like all the rest. But he was so wriggly and hyper that he jumped from my arms (I was standing) and fell onto the floor on his head. I still can remember the squeal and how quickly I scooped him up to check him and sooth him (and I also remember his mother giving me the eye and showing her teeth... she thought I had hurt one of her babies!). From that moment on the little dog was by my side. Every time we were at the house, that puppy followed me around and wanted me to play. So, I ended up taking that puppy home.

He cried the whole way home... hated the car ride (and he never learned to like them). He got home and for several weeks I couldn't think of name... he started to answer to "Puppy" and I knew then that I needed to find a new name pronto! I happened to be wearing a Hootie & the Blowfish tshirt sitting outside with my mom and the new dog. So, I tried calling him "Hootie" and he responded immediately. So, it stuck. He would forever be the Hootie Dog.

He wasn't allowed on the furniture, but he would sit on my lap, or if I was stretched out, he'd lay on my legs... he did this all the time, and he'd never actually try to sit on the furniture otherwise. Just on me. He chewed the dickens out of everything in the house when he was a puppy and teething. He would dig and chase after moles in the yard, just as he was bred to do. He loved to be warm and during the winter would snuggle up to a little space heater. He thought he was a big dog and would bark toe-to-toe with dogs 3 and 4 times his size.

He went through a rather chuncky period... Daschunds are often called "weiner dogs" well, he was so big we called him a sausage dog. When Eric joined the family, he said that Hootie was a Jumbo Sausage! So, he ended up going on a diet and was a healthy weight the last few years.

K called him Hoo-Dog. I think she liked him because he was on her level and small. And he was so good with her. For a stubborn old dog stuck in his ways, he never snapped at her. He'd even gently take food from her, and that was rare because from anyone else he'd practically take your hand off trying to get the treat. He instinctively knew she was small, little, and fragile.

So many memories... it's hard losing a pet. He was our dog from the beginning. 13 years.

And so, he took ill this week unexpectedly... some medicine he took exacerbated an existing health problem. His heart had swollen - much like congestive heart failure in a human. His lungs had fluid, and his breathing was labored. Overall, you could tell it wasn't good. So, instead of baking cookies like we had planned, my mom and I were in the vets office. Just as we had been when Q had to be put to sleep, we sat there, petting Hootie and making his last moments as easy as possible. He went to sleep peacefully and crossed over the Rainbow Bridge. I'm sure he's running around healthy now with Q just like the used to.

It's been kinda hard on my parents. Feelings of guilt and grief. And a bad time of year to lose a pet. And me, I'm left wondering how to explain to my 2 year old that Granny and Granddad's doggie, Hoo-Dog, is gone.

Rest in Peace, Hootie. We'll miss you.

Hootie visiting us this past March.

Hootie sitting on my legs while I was pregnant with Katie - definitely no room on my lap!

Dogsitting Hootie several years ago.

Hootie playing with his big ball - he'd chase it forever! We called the sport "Hootie Ball!"

Hootie making a silly face.

34 and counting...

2008-12-16T17:03:00.002-05:00

I really wanted to blog this a couple days ago, but things got busy. Congratulations to my mom and dad for reaching 34 years of marriage. In a day of divorce and easy outs, they realized the value of sticking through the tough times together. I'm so happy my parents are still together and still love each other. It's a good example to those of us still in early years of marriage, as well as a good example to my children. Here's hoping they have 34 more years together (at least). Love you!

I Felt the Earth Move Under My Feet...

2008-12-16T16:52:00.003-05:00

Wow, so I felt an earthquake... and even though there have been a few others in the past few years, I don't recall feeling them. I think this was the first time I really felt one.

I had just finished nursing J, and Eric was still asleep. K was asleep in her room. I went to go into the bathroom to get something (holding J) and the loudest BOOM happened. Then everything started shaking and rattling. It was creepy!! It woke Eric up, and well, that just never happens. He sleeps through babies crying. Immediately I gave J to Eric and went to get K. She was awake, sitting up in her bed looking around. She saw me and said, "Big tractor scare me" and started to cry.
I picked her up and hugged her tight. She thought it was one of the construction vehicles across the street.

We made our way downstairs and turned on the news knowing that one of the local news channels would break in. They didn't actually. We turned on 94.3 and they had something on their news. Then the tv stations started reporting about it.

Turns out it was something around a 3.6 quake. Scared me, so I'd hate to feel anything stronger! As a kid, I used to have nightmares about being swallowed up by the ground during a strong quake (I think from watching Superman: The Movie - remember, Lois dies in the quake before Superman travels back in time to save her?).

Well, let's hope this isn't a sign of anything bigger to come. Charleston hasn't had a "big one" since the 1880's.

Virtual Nurse-In

2008-12-15T22:47:00.002-05:00

Found out about this through The Motherwear Breastfeeding Blog and thought I'd share. To protest Facebook removing nursing images, MILC (Mothers International Lactation Campaign) will be hosting a virtual protest/nurse-in on Dec 27. I intend on "attending." And just for good measure, I'll include a nursing photo of mine. :-)

Here's what was on Motherwear's Blog:

On December 27, M.I.L.C is urging Facebook members to change their profile pictures to a breastfeeding image. M.I.L.C. is also planning in-person events on that day.

From the event organizing site:

Facebook continues to classify breastfeeding photos as obscene content. They continue to arbitrarily remove these photos from member albums and profiles, accompanied by warnings of account termination. This is highly discriminatory and an affront to nursing mothers everywhere. In protest of this, Mothers International Lactation Campaign (M.I.L.C.) has planned a virtual day of protest...

In protest to the discriminatory and unjust policy of Facebook administration classifying breastfeeding images as obscene content, on December 27th, 2008 M.I.L.C. is asking all of you to change your profile picture for one day, to one which includes an image of a nursing mom.

This could be a picture of you or someone you know nursing a child, it could be a painting or image of a sculpture of a breastfeeding woman, it could also be a photo or image of any nursing mammal….We ask that you include the status line of “Hey Facebook, breastfeeding is not obscene!”

Kids do the cutest things

2008-12-10T16:11:00.002-05:00

So, K is out with Eric and they are sitting in the back of the van watching airplanes go by in the sky. She loves planes. It starts to get dark and the moon comes out. It was just a little less than half moon, but K see the half moon and says to Eric, "the top came off the moon - put it back on, daddy."

J got up on his knees for the first time the other day. So, won't be long and he'll be pulling up all the way and cruising. Whew! Amazing how quickly time goes. My life will become more interesting with him getting so mobile.

K decided today that she wanted to wear panties instead of a diaper. We'll see how that goes. Since she hadn't cared about this, I was hoping to wait until after the holidays so it wouldn't complicate shopping and going to stuff, etc. But, now she wants panties... was actually upset that I put a diaper on her at naptime. Again, my life is going to get more interesting with my kiddies growing up!

Yesterday at a MOPS moms night, many of us were talking about our daughters and if they were girly or not. Some of us former tomboys were concerned about what to do with girly girls. One mom said her daughters were going through a "princess" faze. I said, "Oh, K doesn't care about princesses, so yeah for me!" Well, today Katie sees her dressy socks, the ones with the lace and bows... says she wants to wear them so she can be "a princess." Oh boy!

And now for a slightly embarrasing event that happened in my house... but too funny not to share. K walked in on me getting dressed the other day. She declares, "Mommy has two boobies." I said yes. She then said, "I have baby boobies." (See, a few weeks ago she discovered she has nipples. So, I guess she put two and two together). I laughed at her comment and then she proceeds to lift her shirt up and say, "SEE!" and pointed to her chest. Then she rambles on that one day she'll have real boobies and wear a bra and be like mommy and feed babies. Gotta love it. She already wants to grow up, and hey, she knows that she should nurse! :-)

Done? Not really sure...

2008-12-09T07:59:00.005-05:00

Can't believe it's been so long since I last wrote... it's a busy time of year and getting busier! Good thing J has me up so early in the morning. ;-)

Okay, this entry is never going to get finished... lots of interruptions. J is about to cut two top teeth (he already has the bottom front two). And he's quite fussy about it! Poor guy. I'll be happy when they are in because he should start sleeping better again. I still need to work on weaning out the middle of the night feeding, but I'm so exhausted that I don't have the energy to listen to him cry for an hour or so because he's not getting nursed. Sure Eric will sit with him, but the mommy in me still hears the crying and that keeps me up. It's easier to just nurse and get back to bed. Or fall asleep in the recliner rocker in his room. Anyway...

So we're at this crossroads: are we done having children or not? Eric clearly says we're done (and willing to get the snippity snip procedure), but I just can't commit to that right now. For several reasons I can't make any permanent decisions.

I'm only 33. I feel like I'm too young to just be done with babies.
J is only 7 months old. I don't think this is the proper time to make such a big decision. Sure I'm tired and all now, but this is just a short season of infancy.
I can't possibly imagine right now never nursing another baby. Being a nursing mom is such a big part of who I am. Sure many will think I'm weird, but I LOVE nursing. I know a lot of nursing moms who are sad when they are done nursing for good, and I know I will be too.

There are a lot of other reasons that are floating around in my head... I can't put all of them into words... saying I'm done, ending the child-bearing years of my life, it just doesn't feel right. I can't express what I'm feeling about it at times, and I think that's why Eric and I are at a crossroads about it. Sure there are a lot of logical reasons to be done... we have two (one of each at that) and kids aren't cheap (and I'm sure the financial aspect is a little reason Eric is done) and some days I do feel like I'm done because of the challenges of two year olds... and getting some freedom back for personal interests and our marriage. But I also know that the tiredness, the 2 year old stage, even the financial concerns are all either gone after a while or a manageable. God provides, right?

But I just can't stamp a big ole "DONE" stamp on having kids. Not sure what is stopping me, and sometimes I wonder if it has something to do with losing a baby... it put pregnancy and having babies is a whole new perspective for me. Pregnancy and having babies is such a miracle, so amazing, and I can't say DONE. Like Erma Bombeck said:

Instead of wishing away nine months of pregnancy, I'd have cherished every moment realizing that the wonderment growing inside me was the only chance in life to assist God in a miracle.

So the other day Eric and I went and talked to my OB about perhaps an IUD.... they are "safe" now and would give us time to really decide if we are done. But HOLY COW! I know that some birth control (perhaps more than the manufactures want us to know) do not prevent conception. Well, the IUD does not prevent conception. In fact, the way my OB described the IUD and how it works... oh, just brutal, brutal. The 10 year one, well, it has a copper shaft. And the copper, in my OB's words, "creates an acidic, hostile environment in your uterus preventing implantation." In other words, you would definitely have conception, but the acidic condition in your uterus thanks to the copper would kill the embryonic baby. Yes, baby. In my book, conception is when life begins - is that not when cell division and growth begin? Well, that's life. So you'd be creating an environment in your uterus that would basically be an abortion factory. The 5 year one, known as Mirena, releases a progresterin agent that keeps the lining of your uterus so thin (or non-existant) that once again, implantation would not happen. So, if you believe life begins at conception, well, you are ending that life by not allowing it to progress.

So, Eric and I left the doctors office both agreed that an IUD is NOT an option.

Thus, we are back at the crossroads... and I've been praying that God would give me an answer on how we should proceed. So we'll see...

In my next post, I think I'll share some of the really cute things J and K have been doing lately. :-) As well as maybe put up a few of our family pics we just had done... well, time to go change some messy diapers!

Marine Makes Insurgents Pay the Price

2008-11-27T00:16:00.004-05:00

Go US Marines! What a cool bunch of guys. Glad to know they are defending our country and on our side. :-)

Marine Makes Insurgents Pay the Price

Posted using ShareThis

Melamine traces found in samples of U.S. infant formula: Scientific American Blog

2008-11-26T16:13:00.002-05:00

Melamine traces found in samples of U.S. infant formula: Scientific American Blog

Posted using ShareThis

Once again proving that Breast is Best. Just about every formula maker in the US has been finding Melamine or its byproducts in their formula.

Glad my baby doesn't have to worry about this. I haven't ingested any plastic lately. LOL.

Interesting News Link

2008-11-23T23:25:00.006-05:00

Local mom harassed for breastfeeding in public : News : WACH

Posted using ShareThis

This happened just up I-26 in Columbia. If they were to do a nurse-in at the Walmart on Two Notch, I'd drive up for it.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Obama's threat to Catholic hospitals and their very serious counterthreat. - By Melinda Henneberger - Slate Magazine

Posted using ShareThis

I don't agree with everything this author said, but it would be great if the threat of closing the Catholic hospitals all around the country could kill the FOCA bill.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The last thing we need is a Clinton in charge of foreign policy. - By Christopher Hitchens - Slate Magazine

Posted using ShareThis

This article was good because it reminds us of alot of the junk that happened in the Clinton admin that we may have forgotten in the 8 years since they've been out of the White House.

The Great Right Hope

2008-11-19T15:02:00.002-05:00

The Great Right Hope

Posted using ShareThis

Fascinating article about conservatives suddenly embracing Hillary. Perhaps this is why I've always had a soft spot for her. Not that I would have voted for her for President, but I was rooting for her to get the nomination. And I definitely rather have her at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue than the great and mighty O.

Birthday cake in Heaven?

2008-11-16T21:53:00.003-05:00

So, do you think that birthday cake tastes sweeter in Heaven? Silly question I know... there really is no concept of time there, so I doubt anyone really has a birthday. But, today is a pretty special day to me.

My 2nd baby would have turned 1 today. My due date was 11/23/07, and they of course had talked about scheduling a c-section, so that would have occurred 11/16/07. But God saw fit to take my little angel home sooner than that - just a little less than 9 weeks after that life was created. And the pain was so intense for so long.

Last November I was pregnant with Jonah. Being pregnant with him really helped dull the pain. But I remember the impact that knowing such an important date was passing by and no one really knew. A lost baby is forgotten by almost everyone. Honestly, I don't even think Eric realized it. And I'm not upset about it. I wasn't then and I'm not know. The pain of miscarriage sticks with the mother the most I think. After all, we are the ones that feel like our body betrayed us. And we are the ones that will forever know our bodies carried a life, for however how short a time.

But I'm digressing here...I'm not here to talk about the pain. Because for the most part I'm over the pain. Ironically, though, last week I did actually cry a bit when I heard a song that reminded me of the miscarriage. But really, the pain is gone. Of course, there isn't a day that goes by that I don't think about this baby that I won't meet this side of Heaven. And now that I have Jonah, I still struggle with knowing that had my 2nd pregnancy been normal, I wouldn't have my sweet baby boy who is 6 months old and on the verge of crawling!

Instead, today, I prayed and asked the Lord to tell my baby Happy Birthday for me. The Lord has blessed me with two great babies here on Earth - Katie and Jonah. And one day I'll meet my little one in Heaven. And what a family reunion that will be! Until then, I'll quietly remember every November 16th and mark the occasion in my heart.

Happy birthday, baby! I love you and can't wait to meet you!

Added a new gadget

2008-11-14T16:23:00.002-05:00

See the right side of the blog - I added a new gadget. It's a link to the Fight FOCA website. Fight FOCA is dedicated to fighting the Freedom of Choice Act - the legislation that Mr. Obama has pledged to Planned Parenthood to sign. The monstrous legislation that will basically remove ALL federal and state limitations on abortion, including Partial Birth Abortion.

I would encourage all of you to add the Fight FOCA code to your site as well. If you need help, just ask. But edit your layout, choose to add a gadget, choose the HTML/Java gadget. Then paste in the code found at this site. Save your changes, and you are done.

Oh, and why you are at the Fight FOCA website, how about signing their petition. Also, look up to see which congressional members are sponsors of this bill. If you live in their states, WRITE them. Tell them you oppose this piece of trash legislation.

Let's hope and pray pray pray that this will not pass into law.

On a completely different note - Dr Pepper

2008-11-10T16:37:00.002-05:00

Wendy's Hamburger Chain has added Dr Pepper to their drink selection now. So, I got one today. I was really disappointed. It tasted bland.

Really, I've had this discussion with other people, and Chick-fil-a has by far the best tasting Dr Pepper out there. Next would be Sonic. I'm wondering if these two are the best because of their cups - they both have similar styrofoam cups that really keep drinks at the right temperature. Not that flimsy paper that all the other fast food joints have.

Burger King, McDonalds, and others just don't cut it when it comes to Dr Pepper. And Wendy's now, sadly, has terrible Dr Pepper, too.

I wonder if anyone can explain why this is? I've never worked in the food industry so I'm unsure as to how all this fizzy goodness known as soda is mixed and made as a fountain drink.

On a side note, the proper spelling of Dr Pepper is just as I wrote it. Dr with no "period" at the end. Just a little pet peeve that Pepper Purists like myself prefer. Wow... that was a lot of "p" sounds in that last sentence, eh?

Censorship to come...

2008-11-05T14:49:00.003-05:00

The Fairness Doctrine is set to return.

Here's an article about the news clip that I've included here, too. Talk radio is the same as porn? Whatever. This is nothing more than censorship of opposing view points.

Do you know that when the Fairness doctrine was in existence in the 80's there were 125 talk format radio stations in the entire country. 125. That's juts 2.5 per state.

Now, there are over 2000.

So, they are attempting to censor opposing view points, as well as destroy an industry. Talk radio employs people. Advertisement on talk radio pays salaries. Those advertisers rely on customers to keep in business and employee people.

There is not "fairness' in this. I hate how the libs throw the word "Fair" around to really just disguise socialism and censorship.

If the free market supports talk format stations, then let it. If listeners don't like what they hear, they won't listen and that business will fail. But there seems to be a large audience out there that WANTS to hear what is offered on most talk stations.

I guess the libs are still smarting over Air America's failure. And so because of that, they threaten a whole industry.

When do they go after the bloggers and the internet? When do they go after the newspapers and magazines? When do the thought police come into our homes, churches, and the like?

A slippery slope... very slippery.

I wonder...

2008-11-05T12:54:00.001-05:00

Just over 50 million people voted for John McCain...

I wonder, how many of those 50 million babies killed in the last 25 years would have voted for McCain over Obama had they ever had the chance to live?

Not sure what to write

2008-11-04T22:48:00.002-05:00

Honestly, after tonight's election results, I feel sick to my stomach. I don't really know what to write about it. I'm just scared for my country at this time. Mr. Obama and his stances are so against so many traditional values and basic American principles.

And I keep coming back to Abortion - 50 million babies killed since 1973. 50 million. Let that number sink in. And Mr. Obama has pledged to sign the Freedom of Choice act - which among many things will legalize partial birth abortion - that horrific act of killing a viable baby before delivery by sucking the brain out.

With Barak Obama being the next president (unless something happens overnight with uncounted ballots) - I weep... I weep for the future of our country and all the babies that will continue to be killed.

God, God, PLEASE bless America. Please.

Update on lost puppy

2008-10-31T22:03:00.002-04:00

Well, the abandoned puppy has a new home. The family is a nice one. Fenced yard, another dog to keep this one company, two kids.

Yes, I'm sure they'll be very good to the dog. In fact, if you'd like to meet Maggie (yes, we now have Reagan and Maggie) please come by and see her anytime. Just call first to make sure we're home.

Lost Dog

2008-10-27T17:11:00.004-04:00

Eric found this puppy in the middle of our street last Thursday. He heard a car drive by to the end of the street, a car door open and close, and then drive away. When he looked, there was a puppy in the street.

Very cute dog. Very sweet. Girl puppy not much older than 4-6 months old. Still has puppy teeth.

We really need to find it a home. I don't want to have to take it to a shelter, so please someone, take this puppy!

Want to see the market tank?

2008-10-25T12:18:00.002-04:00

It seems like there are plans by the Dems to get rid of the 401(k) system that we "Joe the Plumbers" - average Americans - get to use to save for retirement.

Read about it here.

If this happens - and the 401(k) system is taken over by the government in order to protect us and minimize risk (actually it would be to shore up the soon to crash Social Security system), I predict the markets tanking when every average American takes the tax penalty and gets their monies out of the 401(k)s before it's no longer "MY" money, but "OUR" money. Talk about redistributing the wealth around.

Scary times indeed, folks.

Mary Mother vs. Martha Mother

2008-10-22T22:52:00.005-04:00

Since I've become a mother, God has used this season of my life to really show me new ways to understand His Word. Perhaps some of these only are meaningful to me; to anyone who might read this blog, they might think, "This woman is crazy. What on Earth is she talking about and where did she come up with this stuff?"

But, this is just another thing that I feel God has revealed to me through motherhood. and it just might be for me, but I need to share it here. Maybe one day I'll write "Wacky Devotionals for Moms" or something like that. I'll include My Big Ten one, as well as this one. This one is still being developed in my brain and this is only a first draft of what I really want to say about the topic.

Are you a Mary Mother or a Martha Mother?

Luke 10:38-42 (New International Version)
Martha and Mary
38 As Jesus and his disciples were on their way, he came to a village where a woman named Martha opened her home to him. 39 She had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord's feet listening to what he said. 40 But Martha was distracted by all the preparations that had to be made. She came to him and asked, "Lord, don't you care that my sister has left me to do the work by myself? Tell her to help me!"
41 "Martha, Martha," the Lord answered, "you are worried and upset about many things, 42 but only one thing is needed.[a] Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her."

Having grown up in church, I've heard this story a million times it seems. Some preachers have made Martha out to be a really bad person for working. Others are a bit more gentle with her, but the moral of this story is still the same... Martha missed the forest for the trees. Christ Jesus was right in her home, and she had a marvelous opportunity to learn from him. Yet, she was too busy finishing up the cookies in the oven and making the coffee for the small group. And it's told to us because human nature hasn't changed since day one... We too often get caught up in the minutia of daily life and forget the important things.

Sometimes I feel that as a mother (and especially as a stay at home mom), I fall into that same trap. So many things to do and so few hours to do them. So the other day I'm doing some chores in the kitchen, K was watching cartoons, J was playing on the floor. And K needed me. Just as I was putting dishes in the dishwasher and about to start a load of laundry... oh, and then sort mail... and then fold a load of laundry... and then wipe the kitchen counter... and then make the tea. Well, you get the point. I had a million things I wanted to get done. And K is asking me to get something for her. And I mindlessly fulfill her request and try to go to the next task. And K again calls for me. And I think she wanted me to sit down with her. And I start to tell her I'm busy and to wait a bit.

Next thing I know I hear a little voice in my head. "Mandi, don't be Martha." K calls for me again. Wanting to get on the floor with her and J. Again, I tell her jsut a minute. Little voice again - "Mandi. Stop. You are concerned about so many little things. Choose what is better. Be Mary."

At that point I realized that all too often I'm a Martha Mother. And this is probably a trap that a lot of us stay at home moms (heck, any mom really...) fall into. Is the house clean, is the food cooked on time, do we have clean clothes, are the bills paid, is the dog fed, etc. None of those things are wrong in and of themself. Just like nothing was wrong with Martha being a good hostess. In fact, in the passage above Martha is commended for opening up her home to the Lord and his disciples. But Martha didn't make the Main Thing, well, the Main Thing. Honestly, the cookies and coffee could have waited. Jesus pointed out that out to Martha.

So, I'm going to strive to "Choose what is better" and realize that if something doesn't get done right away, it's not the end of the world. What matters is being a good mommy to my two little ones. Perhaps if I am more of a Mary Mother, I'll be more Merry, too. Less stress - who wants to be worried and upset like Martha? I know my kids don't need Mommy that way.

And there you have it. Be a Mary Mother.

Presidential Election

2008-10-22T11:35:00.002-04:00

This election is making me very nervous... very. Sometimes I get a sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach as I contemplate the direction this country might take. I wonder if one day I will be telling my children what life used to be like in the United States before "history" was made.

I pray... and I pray.

Most Electric College Football Opening

2008-10-21T23:35:00.001-04:00

Go Cocks!

One of the only things better - being there in person!

Sarah Palin & Trig

2008-10-18T22:34:00.000-04:00

What a lady...

Fireproof

2008-10-18T22:11:00.001-04:00

Go see Fireproof, the indy movie from Sherwood Baptist, that stars Kirk Cameron.

You won't be sorry.

And on another topic... sci fi and conditioning

2008-10-16T14:27:00.006-04:00

If you know me, you know I'm a big sci-fi fan. I love the genre and for a girl, I guess I'm a bit geeky. I've been to my fair share of sci-fi conventions, done the costume thing, wrote fan-fic, stood in line at midnight to see the latest Star Wars movies, nursed my baby while watching Battlestar Galactica, had in depth discussions about the Matrix movies, and dvr a good many sci-fi shows on a regular basis.

So, I'm not here to criticize sci fi or talk about how it is a tool of the devil.

But I do believe that as much as any other medium, it can be used for Satan's purposes. And since he is the Prince of the Power of the Air... well what power goes over the air? TV and Radio signals... Wireless internet signals... etc. So it should be no surprise that Satan uses TV, Radio, the net, etc for his purposes.

Now, I'm a big fan of the show Heroes. Eric and I watch it every week. We wouldn't miss it for anything. It's a riviting, well written, nicely acted sci-fi drama that follows people that have begun to develop special abilities and powers. Think X-Men without the silly costumes and with more personal back stories.

Anyway, the premise is that some people's DNA has mutated or evolved to help them fly, live forever, control minds, read thoughts, run super fast, etc. The typical superhero abilities (and then some).

But it struck me in the shower the other day (one of the few quiet places that I can think) that a show like Heroes is just one medium that is being used to condition the populace toward things that will happen in the End of Days.

If you believe that we are hurtling toward a time when a leader will arise who will be Anti-Christ and deceive the masses left on Earth that he is a Messiah... then I think this might interest you.

What better way to explain away the divinity of Christ than to plant in people's minds that the next step in evolution includes people developing special abilities... it would explain away miracles. It would even explain away the resurrection. All Anti-Christ would have to do is state that the human race is evolving (think Eckhart Tolle type beliefs). Anti-Christ would be an evolved being; those performing miracles in his name (False Prophet and his minions) are evolved beings. Those are the ones that are true believes in Anti-Christ and would everyone believe in him, they too would transcend the normal human plane. For those that remain and believe in Jesus Christ, Anti-Christ could try to explain that Jesus was just one of the early, evolved people that had special abilities. Hence His resurrection and life.

So, anyway, I'm not going to stop watching Heroes or anything... I don't think as a show it is evil. I just think that Satan will use whatever tools he can to deceive as many as possible... and this just might be one of the many ways.

My Political Litmus Test

2008-10-16T13:08:00.003-04:00

When it comes to politics, I am a recovery political junkie. When I was younger, I thought I'd run for office. Then I saw how nasty the back rooms of political parties are... sorry, I'm too nice a person for that. So, I enjoyed being an arm chair pundit. And I love talking about politics. The last few years, though, I've been very fatigued with the whole political scene. I think it has to do with how incredibly disappointed I have become with the Bush administration, as well as the very disappointing Republicans in Congress.

But in the last few years, I've also seen my personal politics change some. I guess it all started when I got pregnant and subsequently became a mother. Let's go back before that time. I was a classic conservative - I didn't have any one litmus test for a candidate. I just wanted them to be a true conservative - limited government, family values (good character, pro-life, pro-family), low taxes, pro-2nd Amendment, strong on military issues. A good "mix" of modern American conservative values. I also was a proud card-carrying Republican.

Now, however, I wouldn't call myself a Republican. I'm a conservative person who really just has one issue that matters to me overall - where do you stand on LIFE?

And really, I used to think people that felt this way were CRAZY... there was more to a candidate than that. I know that I had a spirited conversation about this with Mrs. Vickie, my "second mom" so to speak. We were in Virginia visiting them, and she stated that was her most important issue, and I just couldn't see it. Yes, it was important to me, but it wasn't the #1 issue that made me decide if I could support a candidate or not.

However, now that I'm a mother... now that I've felt life develop in me, now that I've given birth and held a newborn baby in my arms, suckled one at my breast... now that I've experience the pain of losing a baby (notice they don't say losing a fetus)... now that I had to decide to keep a baby or not after a test revealed a potential problem with my baby... now that I experience daily the joy that children bring... I can't imagine any other issue mattering more than how does a candidate feel on the issue of life.

Why? Because how a society protects its weakest members - babies, elderly, disabled - shows the character of that society. And in turn, a politician is defined by what they do to protect those vulnerable members of our society.

So, now, I must apoligize for thinking Mrs Vickie was crazy for using ProLife as her political litmus test. Because I only truly care about that one issue. I pay close attention to the other issues, too... but when it comes time to pull a lever or push a button in a voting booth, whether you defend and protect life (ALL LIFE) is really the only thing that matters to me.

If you can't support the Born-Alive Infant Protection Act (or a version of it in your state house, Mr. O), than you don't get my vote. In fact, if you can't protect an unwanted baby that has just been born... if you won't lift a finger to make sure that unwanted baby has care and is not just placed in a room to DIE... if you can't just acknowledge that the decent thing to do is provided medical care and sustenance, than you, in my not so humble opinion, are a MONSTER.

I have to distract myself and not think too hard on the concept of babies just being left to die for the simple fact they survived an abortion. I can't imagine seeing a little newborn child laying on a cold table in a cold room crying for attention and just not receiving it - abandoned. It breaks my heart and I literally cry just thinking about those babies.

Here's reason why babies who survive abortion shouldn't be left to die... What a great video. Anyway, I need to go get my baby - he's up and awake now. And I could rant on this forever, but LIFE calls.

October 15 - Pregnancy & Infant Loss Remembrance Day

2008-10-15T11:09:00.002-04:00

A while back I blogged that I found out there was a day that most states and even the US Gov't recognizes as Pregnancy & Infant Loss Rembrance Day.

Well, that is today - October 15.

Today I want to honor my angel in heaven. I'd say I want to remember my angel today, but then again, I remember my angel every day. Miss you, baby.

Double Standards - Breastsfeeding vs. Cleavage

2008-10-11T18:48:00.005-04:00

Okay, breastfeeding is NOT sexual. Let me repeat - it is NOT sexual.

Breastfeeding is what God designed our breasts for - to nourish our young.

This photo is not obscene, and contrary to the opinion of the person in this article, seeing Angelina Jolie breasfeeding is not going to make every man think sexual thoughts.

Breastfeeding is beautiful and is the best nourishment for babies. Jolie should be applauded for making the choice to breastfeed, especially twins.

There are a lot more erotic photos of Jolie out there in the mainstream press than one of her doing something so natural as nursing her baby.

I hate the double standard are society has when it comes to nursing. It just really irks me... really, really, really irks me.

My Parents

2008-10-06T15:48:00.005-04:00

Wow. It's like a Job thing or something going on - my parents have had a miserable past few weeks. It started small with a washer needing repair, but then my dad's car had almost 3k in repairs made, their house got broken into, a swing in the front yard broke while my mom and K were on it (no significant injury), and now my mom just got in a wreck while on CSU's campus as she was leaving work.

Lord, could you please keep them safe and from harm? I hate seeing these things happen to them. My parents are awesome and deserve the best...

A Totally Different Topic - One the Big Ten

2008-10-06T13:50:00.007-04:00

Okay, if you read this blog (which is probably just 3 people in the world), you probably think all I ever write about is nursing. That's not entirely true. It is a passion of mine - to encourage, support, and help protect breastfeeding. But it's not all I write about. Basically, this blog is about the subject line on the masthead - "Musings, Ramblings, and the Honest Truth from a Christian Conservative Nursing Mom Living a Blessed Life in Charleston, South Carolina"

So, that means I tend to blog about these things

Christianity
Politics
Breastfeeding
Motherhood
Life in General

Not necessarily in that particular order, but those 5 topics.

It's been a while since I've blogged, and especially about something regarding Christianity. This one was inspired by my daughter Katie. It's about one of the Big Ten (no, not the NCAA conference) - I mean the "Big Ten" as in Ten Commandments found in Exodus and Deuteronomy in the Bible.

Exodus 20:7 says that we shouldn't take the name of the Lord God in vain/misuse His name. I've always taken that one seriously, and it was one that my mom especially made sure people in her presence took seriously (just ask my cousin Tim about the time he said "Oh my G-d" in front of my mom as a kid). I guess that upbringing has always made this one of the Ten Commandments extra special.

But, and as Pastor Pep at church preached not long ago, this verse doesn't just mean the cursing aspect. There are many ways to misuse God's name and vainly throw it around.

So, as often as I've thought about this verse and heard it preached, I don't think I've ever really appreciated it - never thought about it in a personal way.

God commands us not to take His name in vain because He loves us. I'm sure this is just part of the reason, but allow me to explain.

I love my daughter more than life itself. The first time she said MaMa it was magical. When she is ill or hurt and cries out for me, I can tell because of the way she says "Mommy" (she's graduated to Mommy now from Mama). When she is being sweet, I can tell because of the manner in which she says "Mommy." The inflection in her voice tells me what she needs. It tells me if she's happy, sad, excited, hurt, upset, loving. You can tell by the way she says "Mommy." I'm sure any of you that are parents know exactly what I'm talking about. There are so many ways she says "Mommy" that make is special.

Also, if you are a parent, you know that toddlers and preschoolers have a habit of just abusing a word by saying it over and over and over and over and over and over (get the point?). So the other day all of us were in the car traveling back from Columbia after celebrating my brother-in-law's 30th birthday. Out of the blue Katie just starts saying, "Mommy, mommy, mommy, mommy." I answer and ask her what she needs. But, she didn't need anything. She just for the next few minutes repeats "mommy" over and over. And frankly, it got annoying.

And that's when it hit me - how God must feel when His name is just thrown around. He is our Heavenly Father. He wants to hear us call to him as Abba Father and know that we are calling on Him because we're happy, sad, excited, hurt, upset, thankful, loving. He just wants to know that we are calling to Him and not just abusing his name.

That day in the car, the commandment of not taking God's name in vain became personal to me. When my child called to me, I wanted to respond to her and answer the call, fulfill the need, mend a wound, or show my love. But she wasn't calling to me. She was just vainly using my name.

Imagine how much more our Heavenly Father wants to respond to His children. His love is much grander than any human could feel for their children. And when we just abuse his name, I'm sure it grieves Him immensely. And I wonder - does He get annoyed that so many of us humans so casually misuse His name? Well, I guess it wouldnt' be annoyance on His part - more like righteous indignation. Anyway...

Just some random thoughts on one of the Big Ten. I know it doesn't fully encompass that specific commandment and the Holiness of God's name, but I'm sure this is an aspect to it. And I just never really thought of it in this manner. Just one of the many ways God has used motherhood to realize a spiritual truth.

World Breastfeeding Challenge - Oct 11

2008-10-06T13:14:00.004-04:00

This coming Saturday, I'll be participating in the World Breastfeeding Challenge. It is to promote the health benefits of nursing babies. The North Charleston site is going to be at Healthfinders in Northwoods Mall. The local lactation consultants (or as I call them Baby Experts) at Trident - Jodi & Pam - are organizing it. Here is the info if anyone is interested - Site Information for North Charleston We are trying to get as many moms to latch on at 11 am.

There will be food, door prizes, and lots of nursing mommies and our babies! I didn't do this with Katie - but I couldn't pass us the chance to do it with Jonah. He may be the last baby I nurse (sad - very sad), and I so firmly believe in nursing. It *is* the BEST Start to life (as opposed to just a good "Good Start" - like Nestle proclaims - speaking of which, this is the world boycott week of Nestle for their constant promotion of formula to poor developing nations - just a bad idea for so many reasons, considering the lack of clean water). Anyway, I'm digressing.

Come to the breastfeeding challenge! It'll be fun. If you don't live in the Charleston area, check this site to find a site near you.

Breastfeeding and Politics

2008-09-03T15:39:00.002-04:00

I have a LOT of thoughts on Governor Sarah Palin for VP. I will gladly share those in a future blog.

But I saw this article that is going to be in People Magazine and thought, Cool!

The mother of five told People magazine she is still nursing her baby son, Trig, born in April. But she did not think she'd have any trouble balancing her family obligations with the challenges of the campaign or the vice presidency if the Republican ticket prevails in November.

“What I’ve had to do, though, is in the middle of the night, put down the Blackberries and pick up the breast pump. Do a couple of things different and still get it all done,” Palin said of balancing work and family.

Breastfeeding in the news...

2008-08-22T15:59:00.004-04:00

I thought Dara Torres story was cool enough that she's competing in the Olympics at 41 - but this is cooler -

From the HeraldSun in Australia -

Two years ago, the Torres’ Olympic itch returned when, soon after giving birth to her daughter Tessa, she discovered she was swimming fast.

At the 2006 Masters World Championships in California, Torres was breastfeeding between events, but still posted slick times.

What an cool mom!

Breast is best...

2008-08-09T22:57:00.000-04:00

So, we're out to dinner with my in-laws. K had a cup of milk (from a cow) with her meal. Eric's dad looked at J and said, "I bet J would drink this milk up if he could."

I just quipped back, "Why would he want to drink cow's milk?"

Hope everyone had a good World Breastfeeding Week!

Sorry for the pity party...

2008-08-09T22:54:00.001-04:00

If you read my post regarding summer being a bust, sorry for the pity party. I think I sounded pretty sour in it.

Good news is Eric and I took K to the waterpark this afternoon. J stayed at home with Eric's mom. We were able to go for a couple hours after naptime. First time K has been just with the two of us since J was born. It was fun and relaxing.

Yeah!

CVS ExtraCare Bucks - Not the expected

2008-08-09T22:36:00.003-04:00

Okay, so I decided to take the plunge and start working the CVS ExtraCare bucks system. If are unfamiliar with CVS, it's a drug store and they have a frequent shoppers system called Extra Care. You can earn cash back or rewards toward purchases each week based on specials in their ads. It's a cool system once you learn to work it, and well, after reading about it and talking to women at church and MOPS about it, I was pretty hyped up on making my first "deal."

It was a deal on Crest toothpaste. Eric loves Crest and it's the only toothpaste he'll use. So, I had my coupons that I regularly clip and was poised to make the purchase and get extra care bucks, too. It would have been like getting the toothpaste for 24 cents each.

The circular is good through today, August 9th. So, I went to the CVS up at the corner of Ladson & 78. Well, they close at 10pm and it was just after 9:40pm. Not bad. I only needed to grab some milk, the Crest, and hopefully some diapers they had on sale.

The diapers were a bust... no size 2s. Oh well. Diapers go on sale all the time.

The Crest... I find the one on sale that also matches my coupon. I was going to get some more, but got rushed as they started making announcements that it was closing time. Kinda a rude guy working in the store. I actually heard his manager tell him that his announcement that it was closing time was a little over the top. I was the only person in the store, so it was directed toward me. Anyway, I pay, and notice the Crest didn't register as an extra care bucks special. Sure it was on sale, but not what it was supposed to be. Why? Well, they had already downloaded the update for next weeks circular (starts tomorrow, Sunday the 10th) in their system. So, I got ripped off and no Extra Care bucks. Had it not been late, and had Eric not needed some medicine I picked up for him... I would have probably argued about it with them.

Technically the ad circular says to good through the 9th. And that is still what today is. They shouldn't have downloaded that update until they were officially closed and all customers were gone. I've worked retail sales - I know... you want to leave as soon as the clock strikes closing time. But, that's not how it works.

So, here I was about to enter the exciting world of CVS Extra Care bucks... and I got ripped off. I don't think I'll shop that CVS again soon. I'll just go to the one on Main Street. They are open 24 hrs. At least, I did get to pick up the ad circular starting for next week... but still... how disappointing.

What a bust...

2008-08-05T12:19:00.002-04:00

Summer has been a bust. Definitely not what I had hoped to do with K. Granted she's only two and won't remember this summer when she's grown, but it just didn't work out the way I thought.

I bought passes to the waterpark. I think we've used them twice. I really want to take K more but... there's J. He's too little for the water; I hate to take him out in the miserable heat we've had this summer; and he's now at the point where he just doesn't nap well out. He will nap some, but he's matured in his sleep patterns, so it's not like newborn sleep where that's all they do. Plus, he doesn't nurse well there if I've been in the water because of the chlorine smell/flavor.

And really, how do I watch K there by myself and watch J? A lot of moms I know from church and MOPS go regularly. Eric and my mom wonder why I don't go with them. Well, they are busy watching their kids, too. I don't feel right asking someone to also watch K while I'm tending to J, or vise versa. I guess I have not because I ask not... and I know one of my faults is that I have a hard time asking for help.

J's the reason that we haven't gone lots of places... bounce places, playgrounds, the beach. Maybe I'm too cautious, but I believe in keeping my eye on them both at all times. A child goes missing every 10 minutes (or something like that) and I'm just afraid if I go out with them both to some public place and K fell down or got stuck somewhere or something... well, I can't leave J alone, that's for sure.

Part of the issue is I can't really leave him with anyone for an extended amount of time. He doesn't take a bottle very well, but he will if absolutely necessary. But, I can't pump and freeze milk because it gets a soapy/funky smell & taste once it's frozen. This is a known issue with having an excessive amount of an enzyme Lipase in my milk. The only way to solve that is to scald the milk before freezing, but then that destroys a lot of the good stuff in breast milk, which kinda defeats the whole reason for nursing.

I had this problem when nursing K, too. But she NEVER took a bottle, so it wasn't an issue. I did express, scald, and freeze some milk once she was eating solid and drinking from a straw/cup because at that point she was getting other sources of nutrition. But I don't really want to give J scalded milk just yet because it's his only source of nourishment.

Anyway... I just feel like this summer is a bust. I hear of moms I know going to the water park and other fun places all the time.... and I often make plans to go. It just never seems to work out. And today is just a rough day, and when we do get out of the house things just seem to go better. K is definitely not a home-body, but she's been stuck here a lot. I was hoping even other people (like relatives) could take K places, but one set of grandparents works, and the other doesn't seem to think about taking her places (even though I consistently drop hints their way... );they always just play at the house. And surrogate grandma hasn't been available much this summer, either.

It's just a bad day, and this blog entry is just a reflection of my pity party... and now both children are crying again... off to the races.

StumbleUpon

2008-07-09T23:27:00.003-04:00

So, I installed a new add-on in Firefox - StumbleUpon. Sometimes Eric and I lament that we've run out of things to look at on the Internet.

So, this site lets you put interests into your stumble profile, and then from firefox and a little toolbar, you get to hit the Stumble button and it takes you to a random website based on your interests.

It's a cool little app, and I think just for fun and your edification, I'm going to regularly list sites that I've stumbled upon and found interesting (for good or bad).

Today's list...

I Do Dog Tricks - I thought it was mildly amusing, as it lets you type on simple dog commands and the little puppy does what he is told. Entertainment value is pretty good, especially for dog lovers, but it would get old quickly, so the lasting value means I wouldn't bookmark it.

BibleMap.org - Okay, now this site is just plain cool I think. It uses google maps and then lets you choose a Biblical passage and maps it for you. So, if you are reading the Bible, wonder where some place like Ur, or Ephesus, or Petra might be - tada! Easy to find on a map this way. Lasting value - definitely bookmark.

Old Computers - Okay, now for a tech geek like me this site could be cool. But, when I tried to use the page, many links didn't work and it was just cumbersome. Someone likes old computers, and obviously they like old html programming too - hello, it's the year 2008! Maybe try a content management system and update the look of your page!

Your Age on Other Worlds - So, if you like science and silly science facts, you can put your birthdate in a calculator on this page, and it will tell you just how old you are on the other planets in our solar system - it's very scientific and has an exclamation that uses math (gahhh... math) - in fact, I even saw a square root symbol thingie, and that just makes my brain hurt and all comprehension of what I was reading go away. What is that thing called, a radical? It does have an interesting link to Your Weights on Other Planets, and according to that, I don't need to lose weight if I lived on say, Pluto. But then again... Pluto is no longer a planet. What a shame.

And finally an article on a couple that enjoyed their marital relations every day for a year. Two things - More Power to You! and They obviously don't have preschoolers at home. Who would have the energy?

Another Reason Reagan Was the Best

2008-07-09T22:36:00.004-04:00

In case you don't know me very well, I absolutely think that Ronald Reagan was the best POTUS ever. EVER. It's my blog, and I have a right to say that, and should you try to argue with me... well, don't.
Anyway, I didn't realize this, but in 1988, Ronald Reagan made a Presidential Proclamation declaring October Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month. That's just cool that he realized just how much this would mean to those who have suffered such loss.
Here is what he said in regards to this proclamation:

“When a child loses his parent, they are called an orphan. When a spouse loses her or his partner, they are called a widow or widower. When parents lose their child, there isn’t a word to describe them.”

Ronald Reagan... yet another reason to admire the man. Thank you, Mr. President, for thinking of those of us who have lost an angel.

UPDATE:

October 15 is now recognized by I believe all 50 governors and even the US Congress as Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day. You can find out more at this website called October 15th.comby the lady who spearheaded this effort.

(Just as aside, I find it interesting that the resolutions and such state that a baby lives, even for a short time, before miscarriage, pregnancy loss, stillbirth, etc. Yet, some of these same politicians are pro-abortion and even defend the right to partial birth abortion? )

Anyway, I don't want to digress into a political diatribe here. I really just wanted to highlight this important event - Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day.

Great Breastfeeding Poster

2008-07-09T22:21:00.002-04:00

Okay, the Australian Breastfeeding Association has some great posters on why nursing is environmentally friendly. Now, I'm no "tree hugger" but I do try to think we need to take care of God's world as much as possible. I never really thought of nursing as something I could do to help in that way, but this poster struck me as amusing. They had a few others that were cute, too - at this link.

If you are particularly sensitive to breastfeeding images don't scroll any further.

Otherwise, enjoy the poster!

space
for
those
sensitive
to
booby
pictures
though
this
really
is
just
an
image
of
a
baby
nursing